I sighed, long and heavy, and tried to think of another way I could tell her that she was being ridiculous.

But she kept looking up at me with her big, golden eyes, magnified by those cheeky round glasses she was so fond of.

"Please, Inego-san!" she begged. "I'm begging you! I'll turn into a kettle and you make tea in me!"

She mock-pouted, weaving her fingers together and dropping onto her bare knees in front of me.

"Azuki," I said, exasperated. "For the last time, no."

"But—"

"No!"

I didn't mean to raise my voice, and she jumped a little.

"Hey," I said, reassuringly when I saw how anxious I'd made her. "Azuki, listen, okay?"

She adjusted her glasses, turning to a mess of pixels and static for a second.

"You know you're going to burn yourself, right?" I asked.

Her wide eyes somehow grew even wider.

"Oh, is that what you're worried about?" she asked, cavalierly.

I extended my hand and helped her to her feet.

She giggled, biting her knuckle.

"That's so cute, Inego-san!" she said between giggles.

I watched as a blush crept over her cheeks. She playfully shoved a finger into my chest.

"You're worried about little old me getting burnt? Why? You think I'll get all hot and bothered making tea with you?"

I raised a skeptical eyebrow.

Judging from how red her face was getting, I would bet that Azuki was hot and bothered now.

"Azuki, let's try this again, okay?" I asked, trying not to sound like she was on my last nerve.

This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

She nodded, earnestly.

"Of course!" she said, her eyes heavy-lidded. "I love hanging out in the common kitchen with you like this. Plus, you know tanuki are the best when it comes to shape-shifting."

I looked at the plaque hanging over the dirty kitchen vents, wondering how I let myself get into situations like this.

Grave of the Fireflies Appreciation–Kitchen Commons Area

"I don't know about this place," I said. "Something about it leaves a bad taste in my mouth," I said, gesturing to the sign.

She just rolled her eyes.

"So what? It's one of Studio Ghibli's lesser-known titles," she said.

I winced.

"That's not my point," I said.

Azuki crossed her arms.

"You're avoiding the entire issue, mister Britian. I want you to make tea in me!"

I shook my head.

"You've read the legends about teapot tanuki, right?" I asked. "It never goes well."

She walked over to one of the well-worn couches and plopped her tanuki booty down. Then she gestured for me to sit beside her.

Okay, let's see where this goes.

I sat beside her.

She innocently scooted over, looked up at me, and grinned, trying to show off her dimples.

Inwardly, I felt Flintwick saying he'd be glad to give her pointers.

No. It's Azuki. NO WAY.

"So, I was thinking about those legends," Azuki said. "And I know in the legends that a merchant sells some Buddhist monk a teapot."

I gestured for her to continue.

She stretched, lay back on the couch, and draped her bare legs over my lap.

"I'm gettin' comfy," she said innocently.

She began kicking with her bare feet, and I had to pretend I didn't see the dirt and dust from Crescent Moon Academy's dingy floors clinging to her toes.

"Then the monk took the teapot to his monastery," I said, trying to get her to finish the story.

She sat up slightly, biting her lip.

"Then what happened, Inego-san?" she asked.

Oh my god, I would strangle her if she weren't so earnest… and if she didn't have such adorable thighs.

Stop! It's Azuki, that's a terrible idea.

"You're supposed to be telling me," I said.

She playfully rolled her eyes at me.

"But you're so good at telling stories," Azuki whined, kicking with her damn dirty feet.

She reached into her trinket-covered bookbag beside her and pulled out a Ziplock bag of something that looked like what Rainbow Bright's shady drug-dealing cousin would sell.

"I'll let you have some of my Nerds if you tell the story!"

They looked like she'd slept with them against her bare belly.

I probably didn't want to know if she had.

"Some of those Nerds?" I asked.

She nodded.

"Yeah! They're from the Shady Van Candy Shop downtown."

"Don't you ever go to that candy store again."

She gasped dramatically.

"...Without inviting me," I added, smirking. "Because I'm so there with you, Azuki. High five!"

And she gave me the biggest high five I'd ever had.

Just like I knew she would.

"Now, give me some of those gross Nerds, lass. I've got a story to tell."

She squealed in delight and kicked her legs again. I had to tell Flintwick that, despite her intentions, I wasn't getting used to having her in my lap.

If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc.. ), Please let us know < report chapter > so we can fix it as soon as possible.