The next morning found the ragtag, weirdly successful, often morally questionable band of adventurers standing at the ragged, shimmering edge of the Cursed Plains. The air was dry enough to parch a camel, the sky blindingly blue, and the ground ahead… flat, endless, and miserable, the kind of place that screamed bad idea.

Everyone was packed and ready.

Well, "ready" in the same way a drunk is ready to argue with a lamppost, which is to say, mostly by showing up and hoping for the best.

Raikya was in front, perched astride Frostlick like she'd been born in the saddle. Penelo and Lula clung to the great hound's snowy fur behind her, giggling like children as the beast's massive paws thudded over the cracked earth. Frostlick's tail swished lazily, a hound satisfied with her lot in life… or at least with the three women hugging her back.

Zora floated lazily above the group, scanning the cracked earth and jagged outcroppings ahead, his robes fluttering like he was the one person here enjoying the morning.

The rest of the group trudged behind, some more willingly than others.

Veena was already frowning.

She was slathering cream onto her already perfect skin with the expression of someone being forced into hard labor.

"This sun is hostile," she complained, drawing out the word like it had personally offended her. "Do you see my complexion? This is princess abuse."

Vuvi, however, was the first to break.

"I hate this. I hate walking." She sighed dramatically, dragging her boots like a child denied sweets. "Zora could just…" she gestured vaguely upward "...conjure us something nice to float on. Preferably plush. Preferably with snacks."

She cupped her mouth and yelled up at the fluttering lich. "Zoraaaa, summon me a floating mattress. My feet are going to fall off."

Zora folded his arms. "Can't. Miss Sera made me promise not to."

Vuvi froze mid-whine. "What could she possibly have offered you to betray me like this?"

Zora glanced away, rubbing the back of his neck. "Well… a peek… at her bare chest."

Veena's jaw dropped.

Vuvi gasped like she'd just been told the wine supply was gone.

"You what?" She gasped. She rounded on Sera, hands on hips. "You bartered my comfort away for a cheap strip show?"

Sera smirked, utterly unapologetic. "Wasn't cheap. My chest is a premium product. Besides, we could all use some exercise."

"You absolute—" Vuvi turned to Zora. "Fine. I'll let you see mine right now if you conjure the mattress as some cream puffs."

Zora tilted his head, calculating. But that only lasted until Sera stopped, turned, and puffed out her frankly ridiculous chest in challenge.

"Ahem... Sorry, Lady Blackthorn," Zora said without hesitation, eyes wide as saucers. "Sera drives a better bargain. Quantity and quality."

"WHAT?!" Vuvi sputtered, her hand flying to her much more modest bust.

She hurled her flask at him in rage.

Zora caught it midair and, without missing a beat, opened a tiny portal. The flask vanished.

"Give that back!" Vuvi snapped.

"You shouldn't drink in this heat," Zora said smoothly.

"I will end you!" she started, but Pip stepped up beside her. Without a word, just a soft beep-woo, he patted her back and crouched slightly, gesturing to his shoulders.

Her irritation melted instantly. "Aw, my sweet little metal man." She hopped onto his back. "Fine, I forgive him. Let's go, Pip."

With the drama settled, for now, the team set off.

The party trudged onward. The cursed plains were… ugly. Flat stretches of cracked dirt, broken up by sharp rocks and the occasional half-dead shrub. A few skittering lizards darted between shadows, too quick for even Penelo's curious hands to catch.

After a while, Veena looked up at the sky. "You know," she said slowly, "I don't think the sun has moved. At all."

"Don't say that," Penelo said from Frostlick's back, clutching the fur tighter. "It's already creepy enough out here."

Frostlick whined suddenly and slowed.

Raikya's hand immediately went to the hound's neck. "What is it, girl?"

The frostmane sniffed the air, then whimpered again.

Raikya's face tightened. "She's lost all scents. It's happening again."

"Again?" Lula asked nervously.

Raikya's tone was grim. "Last time this happened, something trapped us. Like the plains folded in on themselves."

Zora, still drifting above, froze. "I see something ahead."

They all followed his gaze. A lone figure in the distance, unmoving.

Raikya didn't hesitate, instead, she shot upright and barked, "Frostlick! Hunt!"

Frostlick exploded forward. Penelo and Lula shrieked in unison, clinging desperately as the wolf bounded toward something in the shimmering distance.

Vuvi threw her arms out. "Stop! You don't even know—"

But it was too late.

She slapped Pip's shoulder. "After them!"

Steam hissed from Pip's joints as divine light flared under his plating. He shot forward like a holy missile, kicking up dust in his wake.

Veena stayed behind with Zora and Sera for all of two seconds. "Sorry," she said quickly. "If something happens to Vuvi, I'm not dealing with her ghost's whining." She vanished in a puff of violet smoke.

Zora turned to Sera. "Want a lift?"

Sera eyed him suspiciously. "…Fine."

Moments later, the rest of the team skidded to a halt in front of a crumbling stone statue perched atop the ruins of what had once been a building.

Raikya dismounted first, spear in hand, Lula and Penelo tumbling off Frostlick behind her. Pip arrived next, Vuvi bouncing down from his back with surprising grace.

Veena blinked into existence beside them.

And then, last, came Zora… floating serenely through the air with Sera in his arms.

"Your hand is halfway up my ass," she said flatly.

"Ah! My sincere apologies Miss Sera. A momentary lapse of concentration."

"Uh huh…"

The group circled the figure. Up close, it was clearly humanoid, though its features had been worn smooth by time and wind.

"What the hell is this supposed to be?" Raikya muttered.

The rest of the team gathered, brushing dust off themselves. Zora floated down, examining the worn features. "It's a sand sprite," he said finally. "Rare creature. Said to be a siren of the desert."

"Looks like a really ugly elf," Penelo said helpfully.

Vuvi ignored them both and crouched to study the base. "There's writing here… covered in dust."

She started brushing it away, but the ancient grime clung stubbornly.

Pip stepped up behind her. Without warning, he raised a palm and fired a sharp jet of water. The dust vanished instantly, along with some of Vuvi's dignity as the splash soaked her entire front.

She turned to glare at him. "Warn me next time, you overbuilt water pistol—"

Her words died in her throat as the statue's surface began to crack.

With a loud snap, crackle and pop, a very real, very soaked and very angry sand sprite shot out of the stone, sputtering and flailing. Her hair clung to her tiny, naked form, sand sliding off her like glitter.

"What in the searing suns?! I hate getting wet!" she screeched in a voice that was both shrill and musical. "I was thinking about stealing a little of your magic and letting you go. But now?" Her eyes narrowed to slits. "Now you're all in biiiig trouble."

The entire group froze.

Lula snorted first.

Veena smirked.

Penelo whispered to Raikya, "She's kind of cute when she's mad."

Vuvi immediately burst into cackles.

"Oh," Vuvi wheezed, "you are so in for a bad time with these weirdos."

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