I'd never been the makeover type, but in retrospect I had to admit that was partly some sort of knee-jerk "I'm not like them" rejection of popular girls which didn't make a lot of sense. Makeovers weren't a thing in Fantasyland, and in fact makeup was less common in general. Where it was used it tended to be just one thing that would send some sort of message in that area - the towns around where I'd met Katrin and Errod had a whole thing with eyeshadow, for example, but nobody wore rouge or lipstick. That all being said, it turned out they did have something very similar to a spa day, which I'd also never done. There were skin treatments, and special lotions, and hair care, and massages.

The massage, in particular, didn't go over well with human Calliope.

"I know you're not stupid," I said, "you didn't think he was attacking you. It's fine if you don't want the massage, but you didn't need to break his nose like that."

She sighed. "Fine. I will... apologize."

"Katrin is already taking care of it. Just... calm your tits, okay?"

Sadly she didn't get the expression right away, and instead thought I was complaining about her actual breasts for some reason. We were all naked except for short towels around our waists and - in Calliope's case - that fucking wooden mask. She'd taken it off when we went to the Enhancer and took all the scars away, matching her body to mine to get the extra inch or two of height and better muscles, but she had put it right back on anyway.

We headed over to one of the steaming colored pools and climbed in, the heat quickly going from uncomfortable to pleasant as I adjusted. Odd fragrances swirled around us, and I wondered again how much of the promised benefits were bullshit. Surely, even in a world of magic some people sold snake oil. Right? Once I'd fully acclimated to the temperature I turned to Calliope. "So... why are you still wearing the mask? Are you waiting for me to get a new face? I thought we agreed it would be good to have my face match the drivers license for now."

She squirmed. "I.. I was supposed to remove it when I killed you."

"I don't know how to break it to you, but you suck at this revenge thing. You've actively saved my life at least twice now. Just... take it off when they do the next round of that face cream stuff, you'll thank me. Otherwise... well, as long as you're not still trying to kill me I'll leave it to you. You're going to have to take it off on Earth though, it'll draw too much attention."

"Once I am back with my mother, that will be no problem."

"No, before that. Listen. We're going through Nusos, and I'm going to have very limited control over where we come out. Earth is huge, and has tons of buildings, so finding that one specific house is super unlikely. I'll be aiming for the East Coast in general, even if our employers have other plans, and then we're going to have to take a train or a car or something. We could be on Earth for days before we get to mom's house, weeks if something goes wrong, so get comfortable with the idea of showing people your face."

Katrin returned, and slid into the pool with us before looking directly at me. "Speaking of getting comfortable showing people parts of your body, I'm surprised you've joined us here. You always acted funny when people had their clothes off." She turned to Calliope. "Any time we went to a bathhouse, she insisted on a private room, or if they didn't have one she would find the most secluded corner. When we got to Erathik and people were doing their laundry in the public fountain she looked like her eyes were going to pop right out of her head."

"Hang on," I said, "I've actually taken all that in stride. Yes, I think it's strange some people decided to wash the clothes they were currently wearing by stripping down in the street. But I didn't make a big deal about it or anything, did I? It's not like I've been going around telling all the topless women in this world that it's immoral - hell, if anything I approve of it, it's bullshit that on Earth guys can go around topless and girls can't. Actually, okay, that's not all of Earth, but you know what I mean. The point is, I'm allowed to be... modest."

Calliope started to snicker, and then devolved into a laughing fit so intense that she almost drowned. When she finally regained her composure, she pointed at me. "A modest Sahrger! Hah!"

"I do recall that Xeyul had some... odd... clothing choices, but it doesn't seem funny enough for that kind of laughter. Whatever, I guess it's a good sign that you're finally cheered up by something other than fantasizing about my death."

"No, I will still do that," she said. "In fact, we should begin practicing."

I was scared to ask. "Practicing for my death?"

"I have not worked on curses often. The Sahrger did not need me for this, and they do not work well against the Sahrger. But now that you have a Dumine, this may not be the case for you. I will begin cursing you and your friends, and the two of you will practice removing these curses. That way, when the Sahrger come for you some day soon, you will have a chance to escape."

That was... really generous of her. I wasn't sure how much I needed it - I could buy some of those anti-curse charms, and in the short term we were going to be on Earth so they wouldn't be a concern. Or... wait. "Calliope... I just realized I'm not sure if you'll be able to use magic on Earth. Imperial magic works there, at least some, because of whatever the Clockmaker did and some things called Planar Antipodes and a... programming language. That's a whole mess, I don't want to think about it right now. And I could use magic some, clearly, but that was me doing innate magic which doesn't rely on language in the same way. Your stuff... that's a language-based system, and the Common Local Understanding on Earth won't know what the fuck you're trying to do."

She nodded. "It would be a shame to lose my spellcasting, but there may be no way around it. I could take your offer of entry to the Duminere, though I would not develop as quickly as you. You are a freak. Your domain in Ematse is far larger than it should be, as well. I felt your lutore once, before you had even gained a Dumine, and thought you were missing layers because they were not where I expected them to be. Now it is even stranger, the layers are impossible to discern - but it is still overly large. I met a man that was hundreds and hundreds of years old, his lutore was still not the size of yours."

Huh. "Well I know why it's impossible for you to see the layers now, but I don't have a guess as to why it would be bigger than normal. I assume that's not a Sahrger thing?"

"It is not. Your parents may have known - they spoke of you as a prodigy, they said that even as a child you were beginning to weave probability around yourself. Even after you threw away that gift, it seems you retain some benefit. What you have learned in half a year should have taken you six times that. If I get a Dumine now, it will take me a dozen years or more to make progress - especially because Earth has so little mana. That is assuming I do not get a dud."

Katrin shook her head. "It wouldn't be a dud. I've been thinking about this, off and on, and I believe that however the Sahrger pick children... it has something to do with the way the Dumines decide which people will get gifts. They can feel it, or something. Cal - uh, Connie was certain the kids we rescued would get gifts, and they did. She was skeptical about Errod, and he got a dud. If the Sahrger picked you to be swapped with Connie, you're almost guaranteed to get something."

Calliope nodded. "I will consider this. I tried when I was young, believing that it would make the Sahrger leave me along if I were more like them, but the spirit refused me."

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I sat there for a moment, enjoying the hot water and the nice scents and just trying to fit that sentence into what I knew about the world. It was like I'd missed part of the conversation. I glanced over at Katrin, and she was clearly a little lost too; her forehead was all wrinkled, her lips pursed. "Hey, Calliope," I said, "what the fuck are you talking about?"

She sighed. "You know nothing. There are places of power, where your lutore may be inscribed with the language of the gods."

Katrin perked up. "There's one left? Lute taught me about them, but he said the Clockmaker destroyed them all to make the Dumineres."

Calliope shrugged. "There is at least one. It is controlled by the Sahrger, but I have snuck in at times. I used the power that gathers there to try and return home - it was supposed to switch our places, and I ensured it would not have any of the physical adjustments that are needed for teleportation to function. You should have arrived in that place a ruined mess, your brain flowing from your ears, for your people to find when next they visited."

Ah. Well, that checked out. "For what it's worth it almost worked, I just appeared in the wrong spot. I did almost die though."

"As did I," she said, "when I appeared in the middle of a wedding ceremony. It was very embarrassing, and... I will not be discussing details. I do not know what I did wrong, but it was a very complicated spell. The temptation to solve everything in one decisive action was too great."

Someone came around with glowing rocks you were supposed to rub on your face, and we each took one. Calliope even removed her mask, albeit very hesitantly. The wooden mask floated between us as she sniffed at her rock and scowled. It was strange to look at someone with my exact face but such clear differences in her facial expressions - also with such short hair; she'd shaved it all off and had it regrown so that it would be our natural color rather than the bright green she'd somehow made it before, but the growth had been stopped while it was still shorter than I ever wore mine. "Is it possible the spirit thing fucked up your spell? I mean, if it's under Sahger control maybe it didn't want you fucking with me."

"No. I believe I simply made a mistake. The spirit only inscribes lutores, nothing more. It is used on the rare occasion that a Sahrger child is born with no measurable ability. Unlike a Duminere, it always grants power - but there is no choice in it, or if there is the choice is the spirit's alone. When I begged it for the power, it laughed. Told me it could give me all that I wished, power over my fate and the ability to forge my own destiny. To destroy my enemies and return home. But only if the Sahrger allowed it, which they never would."

Katrin and I shared a look.

"Listen... I mean, we have a lot going on, but... I'm just saying, they hate me anyway. If you want, if you think we could do it without getting killed, I could swing us by there and tell the spirit to hook you up. It's for sure a bad idea, the Duminere is way safer even with Tindelus around and you'd get to pick the powers yourself. But... I don't know, there's something poetic about you showing back up and making that spirit eat its words."

She sat up a little straighter in the water, eyes wide. "It would be the greatest insult to them. It would be humiliating. The family of Sahrger in charge of guarding the grove would be dishonored for all time."

Katrin shifted around nervously. "Oh gods, there's two of you. Listen. We only have a few days before we're supposed to leave on the job, and I know you wanted to stick with them until we can meet the sister and see if she knows anything about what happened to you on Earth. That's important to both of you. Attacking a sacred location that the Sahger control seems extremely dangerous at the best of times, and if we don't have time to plan ahead it's probably suicide."

I looked at Calliope. "You've gotten in there before. How dangerous is it? And where is this place, anyway? Is it in Xeyul?"

She shook her head. "No. The places of power were all on the prime plane. This one is hidden by magic, but the effect is weakened if too many are present; this requires them to have only a handful of guards. They patrol the borders, but I know a secret way to the center... your parents were traitors, they wished to have access without asking anyone. I do not understand the twists and turns of Sahrger politics, but one rule was simple: if you had to ask another for permission, you were weak."

"How long would it take us, if we wanted to get in and out?"

She hesitated. "Teleportation is of limited help, as it is not near any large cities. How fast is your airship?"

I pulled us into my memory palace and showed her a map of the continent. "Here's Erathik, and here's Good Charl. With one stop... here, near Storm's Keep, this took us five days. Mostly that was straight, but we had to go around some of these mountains."

"Good. The grove is here, to the South in the Coastal Alliance. No mountains in the way, and not far if we take a direct path. If we fly overnight, we could be there and back in three days."

That was just under the wire, and only because of some delays caused by Grunkle demanding certain luxuries that were - according to him - absolutely vital for the group's survival. "It's on an island?"

"In a way. It is connected to the land by a very narrow natural bridge, a series of stone arches over the water that stretch for possibly a half mile. The Sahrger have many traps in place to deter any who attempt to cross, starting with magic that makes them think it is unsafe or uninteresting and then proceeding to lethal attacks. The water is similarly trapped, but not as thoroughly and with many blind spots. There is an underwater passage that bypasses everything, and surfaces inside the base of the grove. From there, a narrow vertical crack leads to a hidden opening at the surface."

Okay. That sounded doable. I was a decent swimmer, and I had that cool helmet. I was great at climbing too, and had never been stronger. "That sounds doable. Uh. What do we do if we pop up and someone is there?"

"It is the... twenty-ninth of the tenth? No one will be using the site over the next week. The first of the eleventh is the next day of any use, with six additional planes aligned. We could be there and gone before any are even aware."

I hesitated. "This is a terrible idea, isn't it?"

She nodded. "Yes. Do we leave tonight, or in the morning?"

Two hours later, still glowing from our spa day, we broke the news to Sige. "Hey Sige! We're going on a reckless suicide mission to further piss off the Sahrger and we need to use the airship if we want to get there and back in time for the other job. If you don't want to come with us I can get you a hotel for a few nights."

"Hey guys! Whoa, strange to see two of you again. I mean, I knew - you mentioned - but, fuck."

Calliope reached for her mask, which she'd kept hanging from her belt, but I swatted her hand away. "Thanks, we're just sharing the face temporarily. She made me promise to get my own face after this job, so it'll be all hers. So. Crazy mission, or no? You wouldn't need to actually come on the sneaky part, it involves climbing and I know your hand is still fucked up. You could just chill on the ship. It's just that if we stupidly get ourselves killed, or lead a bunch of Sahrger back to the ship while we're running away, or whatever... y'know, you might need to deal with that. Katrin made us promise to also say that she thinks this is a bad idea and that us outvoting her is keeping her from doing her job as the assigned voice of reason, and she said to tell you she's hoping that you'll talk us out of it."

He grinned. "Sounds like a blast. Yeah, the hand is still pretty fucking floppy so no climbing for me. But I'll keep a lookout."

"Fuck yeah. Okay, let me give you some money for some anti-curse charms, just in case. Uh. Get as many as they have. Katrin and Errod are coming too, so it's the whole gang."

A voice came from behind us, on the ramp up to the ship. "Coming where?"

"Matlyn! Hey! Did Orick get on his way okay?" Look at me, asking about other people like someone with empathy and social skills. Also I was trying to change the subject.

"He did, thank you for asking. He's already in Spinehollow, and will be back in Steel Tooth by the end of the day tomorrow. Where are you off to?"

"Oh, just running a quick errand. You said Grunkle's supplies won't be ready for a few days, right?"

She made a face. "Yes, I'm starting to worry you were right about him. But he knows so much, and... well. We'll make it through. Can I join you on your trip? I don't know anyone here, and now that my brother is gone... oh! I... didn't know you had a twin sister!"

Ah, right. "Matlyn, this is Zaile. I didn't mention that she's my sister before, because... well, we didn't grow up together and..."

Calliope stepped forward. "She is a Sahrger, whose parents switched us when we were children. I am no longer trying to kill her."

"Yesrin's tits, Zaile. You can't just say that to everyone. You're going to get me killed, everyone hates the Sahrger."

Matlyn's eyes were wide, and she'd taken a step back. Calliope shrugged, unconcerned. "If she hates the Sahrger, she can come with us on our mission." She turned to Matlyn. "We will be humiliating the Sahrger, and stealing power from them. You can join us if you wish, and if you are willing to kill any Sahrger on sight."

Matlyn looked at me nervously. "But... not this one?"

Calliope sighed, as if still disappointed. "No. No, she is... allowed to live. She has saved kidnapped children and returned them to their families, and will be returning me to my own mother. She... we are..." She hesitated, and clearly decided not to say whatever she'd been thinking. "The other Sahrger are out to kill her already. She has made her choice. Are you coming with us? We may die."

Matlyn looked terrified, and confused, but there was an odd twinkle in her eyes. "Okay!" she blurted out, looking shocked that she'd said it.

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