"Malichi!" Allan says with a cheerful smile as I enter his study and activate the silencer. "How was your first week at school?"

I give an askance look. He does remember that I've come back to the house to discuss problems, right? "You mean besides the princep deciding I've insulted him and forcing me into a situation where I'll be socially ostracized forever?"

"Right, well, you know."

I sigh and start counting off my fingers. "Well, my teacher hates me, the head priest of the sun is scrutinizing me, I took a wrong class and can't replace it, a blue listed is going out of his way to annoy me, two of my closest… friends hate each other and are fighting over something they won't tell me about, another contact's family is suddenly ominous and another princep is being weird about another acquaintance and is threatening me to stay away from her brother who happens to already be in one of my classes." I finish counting off my fingers and nod satisfied that I've got them all.

"Ah… well, I'm certain your teacher doesn't hate you."

I give him a straight look. "She spent the last year trying to track down and kill me."

"Oh, you mean 'other you.'"

"Yeah, what did you think I meant? I'm charming in person."

He gives an amused look which I return with a challenging glare maintained only a few seconds before glancing away chagrined but with a slight amused smile of my own.

"We did get into an argument over my accidentally revealing military secrets to civilians," I half mutter, causing him to laugh with a single exhale before perfectly suppressing his mirth.

"It seems like you had a bad week."

I shrug. "I mean, not really, or at least it shouldn't be… I think the most stressful part is that I'm finding it stressful. I mean, it was better than most good weeks in Caethlon – I'm not starving, and no one has directly tried to kill me, but I'm reacting as if they have."

Allan shrugs. "I can't say I've experienced much hardship like you have to compare resilience, but at the very least I would have found your week stressful too. Perhaps resilience is built to specific types of stress rather than just total amounts."

"Maybe, regardless the best way to endure is to deal with the problem. The most potentially urgent situation would be the high priest of the sun scrutinizing me. He's weirdly curious about my contracts and offered ten large gold to learn and suggested he might even pay a hundred. The most obvious solution is to kill him, but I might not be able to."

"Let's not go killing high ranking public figures please."

I nod. "All right, I figured it'd be too risky anyways. But what should we do then? My first thought was to trick him into violating his oath, but I don't know what it is exactly."

Allan sighs. "Why do you always jump to such drastic measures? Either killing or cursing him would earn you the eternal enmity of the sun. It might even decide to curse you regardless of the cost if it favours him enough. No, we just need to manufacture a scandal that will make him too busy to think about you."

"And you can do that?"

He shrugs. "Well, I've certainly been in the centre of a few. How hard can it be to replicate what I've done by accident?"

"That's…" not entirely reassuring, but I suppose I can trust him as I have no better ideas. "Right, well, let me know when you think of something."

"Of course." He smiles, confident with a pleased undertone.

"Well, anyway, what should we do about the princep?"

"Which one?" he gives a slight laugh of amused nerves.

"The first one. The one trying to orchestrate my social ostracism – Vincent."

He shrugs. "Not much we can do. We'll spend the next couple of weekends focusing on your etiquette lessons, and I should be able to acquire an invitation and come to your aid if you make a misstep. I wouldn't worry about it too much. Being in the princep's entourage should shield you from most of the danger."

"I don't intend to arrive with the princep," I state flatly.

"…I see… That's certainly a more dangerous option. Will you tell me why?"

"It's um… rhythm, I guess would be the word."

He scrunches his face perplexed.

I explain. "Sigh… well, in the cell, when we messed up on a mission and ended up being pursued, things would fall into a 'rhythm'. The pursuers would make some move against us, and we would have to desperately react to avoid destruction which gave them time to make another move. When we got into these situations Gebal would have us take some recklessly aggressive action. This would always… well usually, catch them off guard and put us in a lead position.

"I acted badly with the princep – weakly. It set a rhythm with him as dominant. To break that dominance, I need to be reckless."

"I see… well that's certainly an interesting theory of social interaction."

"You disagree?"

He shrugs. "Maybe. I don't normally have such adversarial relations, and when I do, I typically don't let it reach the point where I need recklessness."

"Yes, we both know you're better at the social than me."

"That's not… well I guess it was what I meant. Sorry... Well, maybe I have encountered this strategy more than I thought. There are plenty of knights who've neglected their social training and get themselves cornered at their first party. They usually end up challenging someone to a duel to get out of it – sometimes it even works."

"Sigh, will I never stop being compared to knights?" I say with exaggerated exasperation.

He chuckles. "Let's hope not."

"Well, anyway, it's not like I have no plan. Princep Talia was present when he made the invitation and reportedly egged him on. If I can meet her somehow, and present my situation as being exacerbated by her, she may be willing to aid me, if only out of amusement. For instance, if I were to arrive in her entourage it might shield me, no?"

He thinks it over a few seconds. "I suppose. It's at least a better plan than going on your own. I've been trying to find out about any events Talia might be going to since you asked about her. I haven't found anything yet, though I'm confident I will by next weekend.

"Next weekend doesn't give me much time." It'll only be a little more than a week away from the Equinoctial.

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He nods, trying to be reassuring but not hiding a trace worry. "I'll try to find you something sooner, but there's no guarantee. Talia isn't as reclusive as some of her siblings, but she doesn't advertise her comings and goings either."

"…Do you think Greg might be able to help? He has his own information network and I'm meeting him tomorrow."

Allan goes suddenly still. "Why are you meeting Greg?" he asks as if walking along an unstable ledge.

"Why wouldn't I? I'm his patron."

"What?! When did that happen!?" His tone is incredulous and … something. Anger? No. Irritation? Closer.

"The game he hosted. Did I not mention that?"

"No! How did… Did you coerce him as part of a bet or something?"

"…Not exactly." I can't help but shift very slightly in my seat out of nervousness. A mundane observer would miss it, but Allan no doubt catches it, though makes the wrong conclusion.

"Listen, he's a snake. Even if you think you have him pinned down, he'll twist and turn until he bites the hand that holds him."

"Have you… held snakes before?... Never mind. The point is it's not like that. He was eager to become my client. In fact, he's the one who suggested it."

"What did you do that he'd ask to be your client?" he asks in utter bewilderment over the subservience of a man which he has only known as a petty nemesis.

I glance away, unwilling to answer. I obviously can't say I killed a group of thugs he employed to abduct me as that will… well I actually don't know what he'll think about the killing in itself, but it will doubtlessly cause him to realize I sacrificed them as well.

"Listen," I say seriously, "it doesn't matter what I did. What matters is that he's my client and that I believe he has no intention of betraying me."

"And you think you can tell when he's lying?"

"If I couldn't, then I wouldn't have won the game."

"…Alright. Fine. Just be careful. He's surprisingly tenacious." He seems more upset about this than just the danger, but in a way that makes him not want to press.

"…You know, he said the main reason that he hates you is that you nearly beat him several times, but never stooped to finish him off."

"Did he? Maybe that's true." His face goes thoughtful, but shakes it off. "Anyways, go ahead if you trust him. It probably won't hurt. I don't see an obvious way for him to betray you, at least in this. I can't really think of anything else to try, but you mentioned another princep bothering you?"

"Cecilia, but she was focused more on another acquaintance than me. In fact, she found my annoying Vincent amusing."

"Do you think she might be willing to help with him then?"

"…Probably not. At least not unless I declared support for her or gave her something. Maybe help get whatever she wants from my acquaintance – which would likely jeopardize her as a contact."

"And you think this contact is more valuable than a princep?"

I shrug. "Probably not. In fact, until I saw the princep pursuing her I didn't think she was a valuable contact at all. But I guess I like her." Allan raises a questioning eyebrow, prompting me to clarify. "I mean, she's in a similar situation to me; she's Rohdami, you see."

"Ah… Well good."

"Good?"

"That you're choosing friends based on preference and not just the mission."

"… I guess. Speaking of, what do you know about the Aethelhals?"

He makes a face as if smelling something rotten. "You met an Aethelhal?"

"So did you. Ellen, the friend Erika Hanhal brought on her visit is one."

"Huh, well I guess that explains why she didn't say her family name… I don't actually know much about them. Just that they're very rumoured, and not in a good way. The most I can make out is they're supposed to be some sort of failsafe or backup, and that everyone reacts the same way as I did upon mention. Though now that I think about it, the latter might just be because everyone else reacts that way."

"Interesting. Do you think I should ask her about it?"

"Maybe once you're close enough to think of her as a friend rather than an acquaintance."

I nod, putting the suggestion on the to do list.

He moves the subject on. "You mentioned a couple of interactions with your cover. Your teacher and the blue list? Are they a problem or just a stressor? Do you think we need to handle them?"

I think for a while and conclude that even if the answer is yes, I'm too busy anyways. "Probably not. I think the teacher thinks of me as foolish more than anything. Besides, she thinks the one she was hunting is at least ten years older and is a fearless and capable leader, not a youth who's still learning. As to the blue listed? Maybe. I guess every conversation with him is a chance he'll mention some occurrence that wasn't in the dossier, but there will probably be signs of him getting suspicious before he acts. Really, he's just being annoying because he viewed Malichi as a sort of rival."

"Okay, and what about your friends who are fighting? I'm guessing they're not a problem in the same sense as the other things, but do you want to talk about them anyways?"

"Sigh, yeah maybe. I don't know... I like both of them separately, but they seem to have some sort of history that they're both cagey about. Moreover, they seem to want me to choose a side without wanting to tell me what the sides are."

"That sounds difficult."

I shrug. "Maybe. I don't know. Annoying more than anything. They're both… well I guess at least one is fine on their own and doesn't bring it up. The other… well I think he'll be fine too given the chance. I don't think he seriously wants to recruit me other than as a way to get under the first one's skin."

"Some friend you've found," he mutters, seemingly having once again forgotten I can hear him.

"And you've never done the same?" I ask, annoyed at his suddenly critiquing my friend selection after his insistences that I make some.

"Eh, probably," he admits.

I admit back, "I don't really know if 'friend' is the best word, but I find him enjoyable and I don't think he'll be a good contact so it must be."

"Well, I'm glad you thought through that, even though it probably makes things worse to acknowledge both of them being friends."

I shrug. "It's fine. I mean law class will probably be annoying, but it's not like the cult where disagreements might end up with someone being sacrificed." I laugh a little, causing him to go still.

"…You don't really talk about the cult much."

I shrug. "What's there to talk about? They're dead, and I don't plan on avenging them. In fact, their deaths were probably the best thing to happen to me."

"Do you hate them then?"

I laugh. "How could I hate them, they were family."

His face twists then smooths. "A family that sacrifices each other over disputes."

"Well, I was indoctrinated to think so, though less so now. Besides, that only happened once, and the killer was punished."

"At least there's that, I suppose," he says as if he does not really count it. "Though 'indoctrinate is a pretty specific way of describing it."

I shrug. "It's what the Biblio calls it."

"Really?" he looks surprised.

"Well, not the one they gave all the acolytes. No, we just got the pamphlet version." A little resentment creeps past the pang of pain. "But then the empire attacked our lair. I went to help the defence like everyone else, but then I saw it – the patriarch's door wide open with his unabridged copy of the Biblio in plain sight. I felt conflicted, but Anar is the god of ambition, and the knowledge was too tempting to leave be. So, I took the book and ran, leaving my 'family' to die."

"I see. You must have felt…" I see that he's hoping for some emotion, but feels conflicted as to which one.

"Guilty? Awful? Small? Yeah… At least until I read the full Biblio and saw that in addition to advanced spells and rituals, it has a section on growing and controlling your cult, with a subsection of how to foster feelings of family. Then I just felt angry… briefly."

"Only briefly?"

I shrug. "The patriarch did something that makes it difficult to think ill of the cult."

"You mean… mind magic?" He looks horrified.

"Yeah. Not direct personality shaping, as that would have been too destructive for his purposes. Just something that creates a headache at certain types of thoughts to help the conditioning. So, I avoid thinking about the cult to avoid the headaches."

"I see, I'm sorry to have asked about this then. The cult must have been an awful experience."

Was it? I'm not sure. I see that he's hoping that I feel that way, but I don't fully. There were even a few memories that I'm still fond of. Times I would call happy. But I might agree over all so I nod.

"Do you…" he starts hesitantly and then changes course. "You said they were family. Do you still miss them, even knowing it was a trick?"

Once again, he asks a question that he hopes the answer is no. I would even guess he doesn't want to know, but thinks he should ask. I find myself wanting to fulfil his hope, but he'll know if I lie, and the truth is much less definite.

"A little," I admit, "after all, they were being indoctrinated too. Mostly it's just a general feeling of in groupness that the Biblio talks about. Creating a sense of us vs other. But there were a few that I think I liked beyond that. One of the older cultists who taught me most of my starting magic, and a girl who learned with me stand out, though I forget their names… their faces too now that I think about it."

"I see," he says, growing quiet.

"…I um, don't really want to talk about this anymore," I say, more because I sense he doesn't, but also doesn't want to shut me out if I want to continue.

He smiles comfortingly. "Well, I think we more or less have a plan for how to approach the problems. Why don't you rest for a while then we can do some etiquette lessons."

"Yeah… I think I'll do that," I say, not really feeling the need to rest but complying because I think he might. However, I feel suddenly drained when I enter my room, and fall asleep instantly upon lying down.

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