Chapter 420 Goodbye, Goodbye
The greatest understanding that Qin Sheng had gotten during this period was to cherish those who should be cherished, care about those who should be kept in mind, and let go of those who should be left in the past. After all, over these years, instead of saving time for those who cared about him sincerely, he had wasted too much time on those who were unimportant.
Qin Sheng had too many complicated feelings for this woman, whom he had known for 14 years and who had accompanied him for six years. Though Su Qin had given him the best of her young days, had he ever given her anything?
Back when he had been in middle school, he had known Su Qin, who had been smart, beautiful, and kind. When he was in high school, Su Qin had been his girlfriend, which had won him many admirations from everybody around him. After all, he had taken down the campus queen, whom most of his peers had a crush on in high school. At that time, Su Qin had been so outstanding that she had overshadowed all the other girls. No wonder Wu Hao had hated Qin Sheng for so many years.
Though Qin Sheng had not had family members to care about him at that time, he had had a relationship in his most amazing days, which everybody had admired him for. Su Qin had made up for a lot of things that Qin Sheng had lacked. Consequently, at that time, Qin Sheng had been neither rebellious nor degraded. Instead, as he had been accompanied by Su Qin, he had been working pretty hard for his future determinedly.
In college, Su Qin had ignored her family members’ objections and accompanied him to Fudan University. Otherwise, she would have gone to Beijing. During the four years, they had lived an amazing life together. Su Qin had taken care of him attentively and prepared almost all the items of clothing and life necessities for him. They had attended classes, gone to the library, eaten, gone shopping, gone traveling, and sung together. How Su Qin treated Qin Sheng had made his three besties in his dormitory almost prostrate themselves in worship.
Life in those six years was the best for both Qin Sheng and Su Qin, which were also the days of their youth. When they were young, they had loved each other so deeply.
They had been grateful to meet and accompany each other.
Unfortunately, after they graduated from college, a time when most lovers break up with each other, they were no exception. Though it was Su Qin who had taken the initiative to request to break up with Qin Sheng, the deep-rooted problem lay with Qin Sheng. Su Qin had not been able to understand what Qin Sheng was thinking about. Though six years had passed, she still had not succeeded in understanding Qin Sheng’s spiritual world authentically. Moreover, at that time, Qin Sheng had been occupied in making up his mind to restart his life because of his grandfather’s passing away, and he had not intended to ask Su Qin to wait for him for two to three years in vain.
Consequently, Qin Sheng had said yes to Su Qin’s request to break up with him, which had caught Su Qin off guard all of a sudden since she hadn’t meant to. However, of course, as a woman, Su Qin, who was amazing, had acted reservedly. She neither abandoned her pride and dignity easily nor offered to reconcile with Qin Sheng.
Originally, she had thought that Qin Sheng would pamper her sometime later. After all, back when they had a petty conflict, it was always Qin Sheng who had taken the initiative to admit the mistake first. Never had he made her suffer from any wrongdoings. However, she had been wrong this time.
It was not until she had come to her senses that she found out that Qin Sheng’s grandfather had passed away. At that time, she realized that she had made a great mistake. However, when she had intended to look for Qin Sheng, he had disappeared into the crowd and been uncontactable ever since.
Su Qin was in a panic completely. Though she had contacted everyone she knew, no matter what she did, she had not been able to locate Qin Sheng. A lot of people had been dissatisfied with Su Qin after they had figured out the ins and outs. That was because they had known that Qin Sheng had chosen to disappear after he had suffered from double setbacks previously. At a time when Qin Sheng had been in most need of Su Qin, she had chosen to break up with him. Everybody had blamed Su Qin except for Qin Sheng. As a result, whenever others had been dissatisfied with Su Qin, Qin Sheng stood up for her.
After all, they had been together and they had accompanied each other. They could not be a couple of lovers. After they had helped each other in humble circumstances, they had no choice but to put each other behind them and break up. Even so, they would not treat each other as enemies who would never visit each other until the last day of their lives. Otherwise, when they recollected the days when they had been together, it would be resentment instead of their once-glory that popped up into their minds.
During that period, Su Qin had been heartbroken. It had taken her as long as one year to recover from the mental wounds. Originally, she had planned to pursue postgraduate study. But she gave it up completely in the end. It was not until she had started to be occupied in her job that she had put the history of her relationship with Qin Sheng behind her. However, she had not given Qin Sheng up completely.
Otherwise, she would not have stayed in Shanghai. Nor would she have bought this bar. More importantly, she would not have said no to her parents’ suggestion that she should go abroad for further study. She wanted to stay in Shanghai while waiting for Qin Sheng’s return, as well as his explanation.
One year had passed. Two years had passed. When she had met Qin Sheng again, the third year was almost over.
After Su Qin had met Qin Sheng again, she found out that Qin Sheng had changed somewhat, who had been somewhat strange to her. She found it more difficult to figure Qin Sheng out. However, she had still intended to get him back. After all, the relationship between them had been quite beautiful. Though she had worked hard several times, all of her efforts had been in vain. Though she had not asked Qin Sheng to restart their relationship all over again, she believed that Qin Sheng could understand what she was thinking. After all, they had been together for many years and Qin Sheng knew her better than anyone else.
However, Qin Sheng had not given her any chance at all, which made Su Qin start to doubt whether he had loved her sincerely before. If she had not put the history of their relationship behind her, how come had Qin Sheng let go of it so easily?
After Qin Sheng came back, she had cried heartbrokenly several times because of him. Whenever she had tried to contact Qin Sheng, he had disappeared all of a sudden, which had made Su Qin feel somewhat confused and wonder whether it was worthwhile for her to do so. The heavy rainfall in Hangzhou that night had made Su Qin come to her senses completely. She had known that Qin Sheng was no longer the old him anymore while she had been constant as always. Never could she lean upon Qin Sheng’s shoulders anymore. It seemed that besides Qin Sheng, she only had her parents to rely on. Consequently, she had been sincerely heartbroken.
She had been waiting for Qin Sheng, which she had accomplished. She had intended to restart the relationship between her and Qin Sheng, which had been ongoing for six years, and she had worked hard for it. After that, never would she be regretful. Moreover, Qin Sheng had a new girlfriend.
Consequently, she had no reason to stay in Shanghai anymore. After all, this city meant nothing but loneliness to her now. At least she would have the glory of the past and her parents in Xi’an.
As a result, upon deliberation, Su Qin had resigned herself in the end, sold the house, transferred the bar, left Shanghai, and gone back to Xi’an.
Su Qin thought the first half of her life had come to an end. Since she had experienced love, friendship, youth, beauty, and regret in the first half of her life, she thought it was pretty worthwhile, even though the outcome was not that satisfactory.
However, after Qin Sheng had been greatly awakened, he had started to take his inner thoughts seriously. Could he let go of the woman that easily, who had known him for 14 years and been in love with him for six years? Previously, Qin Sheng had thought he had led a quite difficult life and Su Qin would only suffer from the exhaustion and hardship if she chose to stay with him. No man would let his beloved woman suffer from such a wrongdoing. Consequently, Qin Sheng had chosen to give Su Qin up, hoping that she could enjoy ordinary happiness. The reality turned out to be what Qin Sheng had thought. Even the kind of woman like Lin Su had suffered from many hardships after she had been together with him, let alone Su Qin.
Of course, he had known Su Qin’s thoughts quite well. After he had learned that she had taken over the bar, he understood her thoughts. Moreover, back when he had seen Su Qin again, she had treated him the same way as she had done in those years. However, at that time, he had been too selfish, who had only cared about his own life, forced his thoughts upon Su Qin without ever consulting her, and taken the initiative to make decisions for her conceitedly.
Later on, he got to know Lin Su and thought the kind of woman like her was more suitable to go on the life journey with him. Consequently, he had had no choice but to let go of Su Qin, asking her to seek her destined happiness, which might be the best ending for both of them. What’s more, he had promised Su Qin’s father.
Consequently, he had acted quite determinedly. Had he put Su Qin behind him? No. Did he still love Su Qin? Yes.
However, none of that mattered at all right now. That was because Su Qin had let go of him completely. It was not until this time that Qin Sheng understood how deeply he had loved Su Qin. He had loved her so deeply that he had ingrained her into his blood and the deep parts of his brain. Consequently, after he found out about the news, he was so heartbroken.
After Xue Qingyan found out something was not right with Qin Sheng, she asked confusedly, “Qin Sheng, what’s wrong with you?”
Qin Sheng said somewhat sadly, “Sister, there was once a girl who had been accompanying me for six years and waiting for me for another four years. However, I disappointed her. In your opinion, am I a scumbag?”
Xue Qingyan was at a loss and did not understand what Qin Sheng was talking about. However, following that, she recollected when Qin Sheng had brought her here, he had turned to the manager, asking whether they had gotten a new boss, and the manager had explained to them what had happened. Following that, Xue Qingyan had roughly figured out that the so-called beautiful lady boss should be the girl who Qin Sheng was referring to, the one who had accompanied him for six years and waited for him for another four years. It did not occur to her that Qin Sheng would have such a relationship history.
The manager standing by their side was somewhat confused. After he heard what Qin Sheng had said, he could not help wondering if the so-called girl that the man spoke of was his former beautiful lady boss. He disregarded his thought quickly. He had heard that his former beautiful lady boss had been single all the time. Moreover, his former beautiful lady boss was so amazing that this kind of man did not deserve her at all. However, following that, he glimpsed at Xue Qingyan, who was no less beautiful than his former beautiful lady boss. After that, he thought what the man had said might be true.
Xue Qingyan asked randomly, “Are you not feeling guilty at all?”
Qin Sheng asked himself in secret whether he was not feeling guilty at all. He smiled self-deprecatingly as he said, “She gave me the best days of her youth. Yet, I disappointed her. How come am I not feeling guilty at all?”
Xue Qingyan did not know what she should say at the moment. Nor did she know what Qin Sheng was thinking at this moment. After all, she knew that though Qin Sheng had Lin Su, but he still could not let go of that girl, which was quite obvious. Well, as the saying goes, what is true love on earth? That means lovers vow to stick together in life and death.
At this moment, the resident female singer, who was singing the song of Xie Chunhua named Please Give Me on the stage, happened to finish the last line of the song, which went: “While observing the time slipping by quietly; please give me the right to be silent; Never will I care about it, ask about it, complain about it, or mumble about it.”
It seemed like Qin Sheng was seeing Su Qin at college, who had stood there while singing quietly. She had smiled at him only. After she had finished the song, she had walked over and asked him discreetly, “Did you enjoy it?”
As Xue Qingyan stared at Qin Sheng peculiarly, he stood up slowly, walked to the stage, and whispered in a low voice to the resident female singer. After that, he took over the guitar from the girl and said to everybody on the scene, “There was once a girl sitting here quietly while singing. A boy enjoyed her singing below the stage quietly. To her, only the boy was her listener. That was because the boy had been enjoying her singing for six years. Later on, the boy disappeared. The girl had been waiting for him for another four years. Even though the girl had done so for him, he did not cherish her at all. It was not until he realized what he had lost that he knew he might not be able to find the girl again. This song is for that girl, that boy, and the most beautiful six years they shared.”
Qin Sheng started to play the guitar gently. As he heard of the melodious sound, he seemed to have gone back to the playground in high school. The weather had been quite sunny that day and the breeze had blown gently. She had been dressed in a white dress and he had been dressed in the white school uniform. He had been the singer and she had been the listener.
The lines of the song Qin Sheng was singing went as follows: “As the sound of the car disrupted the silence, which was audible yet vague, my shadow bathing in the street light was the shortest distance, which was the most intimate. As the sound of the car disrupted the silence, which was audible yet vague, all was quiet all of a sudden. My shadow bathing in the street light was the shortest yet the most intimate distance. Though I had tried my best, we still could not be in the same world. Oh-then let me clench your hand tightly for the last time. Let’s say goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, to each other hundreds of times. If never will we meet each other again, let’s say goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, to each other dozens of thousands of times.”
Even though Qin Sheng did not have other instruments but just the one guitar, he was indulged in his world completely. He did not care what the other customers would think of him. This song was only for both Su Qin and himself.
As Qin Sheng finished the last chorus, he cried out “goodbye, goodbye” hysterically. His voice was somewhat melancholic, sentimental, and distressed.
After Qin Sheng finished the whole song, he did not know when his eyes had been brimmed with tears. He broke into laughter as if he were an idiot, he laughed so hard that his tears fell down. Instead of paying attention to others, who were looking at him as if they were looking at a monster, he put the guitar aside gently and walked to Xue Qingyan’s side slowly as he said, “Sister, let’s go.”
Goodbye, YOUNG bar. Goodbye, youth. Goodbye, Su Qin. Goodbye, Qinsheng…
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