Chapter 107
"I'm not..." Xie Shiqing pulled down the hand that had been covering her mouth, gasping through trembling breaths, "I'm not trying to break up..."
"I know..."
Zhong Ning had just begun to speak when she was anxiously interrupted by a panicked Xie Shiqing. "Move back in, Ning Ning, will you move back in?"
An eerie silence followed.
"I think... staying apart for now is the better way to handle this," Zhong Ning said softly, but her tone held firm determination.
"Why? Why do we have to separate, Ning Ning? Are you still blaming me? Are you mad at me, holding a grudge?"
The color had drained from Xie Shiqing’s lips as they trembled bitterly. Her voice was filled with heartbreak and choked sobs. "I know I was wrong. I really know I was wrong! You said you'd give me another chance, Ning Ning, don’t go, don’t separate from me, I can’t take it, I really can’t take it!"
Zhong Ning hurried to explain, "No, listen to me..."
But Xie Shiqing seemed deaf to reason, or perhaps only capable of hearing what she wanted to hear. She cried out, heedless and desperate, "I love you, Ning Ning, I can’t live without you. If you really want to leave, then just kill me first!"
Seeing her becoming increasingly agitated, her voice growing louder and drawing curious stares from nearby students, Zhong Ning made a snap decision and clamped Xie Shiqing’s lips shut with her fingers.
Xie Shiqing: "Mmmph mmph...!"
"What are you so worked up about!" Zhong Ning snapped. "Can you let me finish talking?!"
Xie Shiqing flinched at her shout, more tears spilling out, looking just like a wronged little wife.
Zhong Ning was rendered speechless. For a moment, she couldn’t decide whether to get angry or to laugh bitterly.
She let out a long sigh, feeling a pounding headache descend upon her like some kind of irresistible force.
"I didn’t move out on impulse. It was a carefully considered decision." She guided Xie Shiqing into the woods, picking a shady and secluded spot, and explained in a calm tone, "Given our current situation, living separately is actually a good option."
"Our relationship is a complete mess, tangled and chaotic. Moving too fast always leaves hidden problems. Now is a good opportunity—like they say, 'destroy before rebuild,' that’s exactly what this is."
Zhong Ning spoke sincerely, "We can start over, rebuild a bridge of trust and communication, take it slow. For now, let’s forget everything in the past, and get to know each other again, date each other again."
Xie Shiqing was still softly sobbing.
Zhong Ning asked, "...What do you think?"
"What I think doesn't matter," she said through teary eyes. "I want you to move back in... but would you ever listen to me?"
Zhong Ning awkwardly pulled at the corners of her mouth.
"Then why bother asking me?" Xie Shiqing muttered her grievance in a small, aggrieved voice, not even daring to complain too loudly.
Zhong Ning glanced around guiltily, eyes darting left and right.
"Where are you living now?" The person in the wheelchair wrapped herself around Zhong Ning’s fingers in a clinging motion. "You don’t want to go back to the villa. Even though I’m reluctant, there’s nothing I can do. But at least let me know where you’re staying, okay?"
The way she said it was full of such deep grievance, softer than a whimpering puppy—it tugged at the heartstrings even more.
Zhong Ning had no choice but to tell her the address where she was currently living.
It was a residential community close to the school, just two subway stops away or about ten minutes by car—much more convenient for commuting than staying at the villa.
It was a property the original owner had purchased, right next to a park. Opening the window revealed shimmering lake water and swaying lotus flowers.
Zhong Ning had gone through the properties listed under the original owner's name and picked this one for its convenience and quietness.
"Can we have lunch together?" With the address in hand, Xie Shiqing finally began to calm down. She knew Zhong Ning was someone firm in her decisions—once made, they couldn’t be changed, no matter what.
So she didn’t press the issue further and wiped her tears away.
Taking advantage of Zhong Ning’s lingering sympathy, she successfully secured a lunch date.
Zhong Ning said, "There’s a new restaurant nearby. I haven’t tried it yet."
Xie Shiqing pursed her lips, seemingly wanting to say something, but in the end, only gave a soft agreement.
To show she was truly making an effort to improve, she took the initiative to ask on the way to the restaurant, "How do we get to know each other again? Ning Ning, I don’t understand this stuff. Can you teach me?"
Zhong Ning was happy to answer such a question. "It’s like making a new friend. Start by chatting, then slowly get to know each other better."
"I don’t have any friends. Never made any." Xie Shiqing lowered her head, biting her bottom lip. "I don’t know how."
"You don’t have even one friend? Someone you could confide in, who supports and helps you?" Zhong Ning asked in surprise.
"...Mother taught me that everyone is someone to be used or ordered around. From the day I was born, I was trained to be someone in control, someone who manipulates. People like that don’t need friends."
Xie Shiqing blinked her deep, dark eyes. Her expression was hollow, dazed. "Mother said that friends are a weakness. Weaknesses aren’t necessary. If we must choose one constant companion, then only interest—benefit is the eternal friend."
She looked like a fledgling bird just pushed out of the nest, suddenly faced with the vastness of the world. Vaguely, she sensed something missing, but couldn’t quite name it.
What she didn’t realize was that what she’d lost... was a place to return to, a place to find shelter.
Of course—if she’d ever had someone she could confide in, she wouldn’t have turned into someone who kept everyone at arm’s length.
"I can be your friend," Zhong Ning said.
"You won’t think I’m stupid?" Xie Shiqing asked in a muffled voice. "I don’t know anything about this. I’ll probably make a lot of dumb mistakes."
"If there were standards for being a friend, I’d be the worst kind."
"That’s okay. No one is born knowing everything. Everything we know now—we all learned it bit by bit, didn’t we?" Zhong Ning smiled gently. She held Xie Shiqing’s hand; the dry warmth of her palm seemed to pass along an invisible kind of strength.
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