Lewd System: Every Scream and Moan is EXP

Chapter 180: Your Heart Has Other Plans


Jax didn't know what to say.

He remained on his knees, looking up at the crying demon who had just confessed her love to him.

A human.

An enemy of her kind.

A stranger she'd known for mere days.

And yet she had shown signs of love.

His mind raced through various scenarios. Various possibilities. And all of them led to one conclusion.

'This is REALLY bad.'

He should leave. She was right. Walking away now would be the smartest choice. The logical one.

For both of them.

But his heart wouldn't allow it. He was unable to move.

His eyes stayed locked on Nerith's sobbing face. On the pain she was trying so hard to hide. On the vulnerability she'd never shown anyone else.

'Why can't I just rise up and go?'

He knew the answer.

"Nerith."

His voice came out low. Even lower than he intended.

She flinched. But still refused to look at him.

"Look at me."

"I can't."

The reply was instant. Defensive.

Jax got up from his knees. Slowly. Every muscle protesting from the day's abuse.

Then, instead of walking toward the door, he sat beside her on the bed.

So close he could feel her warmth.

"What... are you doing?"

Panic crept into her voice.

"I told you to leave. I told you to—"

"Hate me." Jax cut in.

She froze.

"What?"

Jax stared at the wall ahead. A thousand thoughts forming in his head.

"You should hate me, Nerith."

His voice was sad. Hollow.

"Hate me for being human. Hate me for deceiving you. Hate me for binding you to a pathetic scum."

He laughed bitterly.

"It would be easier that way. For both of us."

He turned to face her.

"I'm not your dream prince. I'm not some hero from demon tales who fights evil and claims his princess with a kiss."

His eyes went cold. Deliberately so.

"I'm selfish. Arrogant. I use people for my entertainment. I even use them for my needs."

His jaw tightened.

"I've done things that would make you sick if you knew."

He leaned closer.

"The women I've humiliated. Even tormented. The lives I've ruined. The chaos I leave in my wake wherever I go."

His voice dropped.

"You fell in love with a mask, Nerith. A performance. The real me? He's not worth your precious tears."

She was shaking now.

But not from fear.

"Don't..."

Her voice trembled.

"You're doing it again."

Jax frowned.

"Doing what?"

"Lying."

Her red eyes finally met his.

"You think I can't see it? I'm not that stupid."

Her gaze pierced through him.

"I can see the way you're trying to push me away."

She reached up.

Her fingers touched his cheek.

Gentle. Warm.

"You're scared, Jax."

His breath caught.

"Scared that I actually love you. Scared that it will be dangerous for both of us."

Her thumb traced along his jaw.

"So you're trying to make yourself the villain. Trying to give me reasons to hate you."

She smiled. Even through those tears.

"But I've seen the real you. From the moment we met. In every moment when you thought no one was watching."

Her hand moved to his chest.

Right over his heart.

"THIS. This is the real you."

She pressed against his heartbeat.

"The one who fights for strangers. Who stands against demons for what? You said entertainment."

Her eyes softened.

"But I can tell it wasn't."

Her voice cracked.

"Who wipes tears from a crying girl's face even when his own body is broken."

She pressed harder.

"Your heart is beating so fast right now."

Jax couldn't breathe.

'When did I lose control of this situation?'

"Nerith—"

"I know you have someone else."

Her voice didn't waver.

"I know I'm probably just another woman to you. Another story to tell."

She looked down at her hand on his chest.

"But I don't care anymore."

Her eyes lifted to meet his.

"I'm being selfish. Just like you taught me."

"This is different—"

"Why?"

She cut him off instantly.

"Why is it different? Because I'm a demon? Because you're human? Because the world says we shouldn't?"

Her voice rose with defiance.

"You told me to choose myself over the world. Over any eyes. Any rules."

Her other hand grabbed his shirt.

"So I'm choosing."

She pulled him closer.

"I'm choosing YOU."

"You don't know what you're—"

"I know exactly what I'm doing."

Her face was inches from his now.

"I'm choosing to love someone who might never love me back. Someone who will probably leave tomorrow. Someone who I will let go happily for his real life."

Her breath was warm against his lips.

"Because I did the crime of loving him."

A single tear fell.

"And I don't regret it."

Jax's walls were crumbling.

Every defense he'd built. Every sarcastic deflection. Every cold calculation.

Falling apart in front of this crying, beautiful, impossibly stubborn demon.

"What do you really want?"

His voice was hoarse.

Nerith's answer came without hesitation.

"You."

She paused.

"Which is not possible. So I want you to pretend. Just for tonight. Be mine. And then leave tomorrow."

Her smile was sad but genuine.

"Just tonight. Let me be selfish for one night. Let me pretend you're mine. That this is real."

Her fingers intertwined with his.

"Tomorrow you can leave. Tomorrow I'll smile and wave goodbye to whatever was between us."

Her voice steadied.

"Tomorrow I'll go back to my usual duties. I'll come up with something to tell people about my husband. Gone for a mission. Kidnapped. Killed by enemies seeking revenge for today."

A tear rolled down her cheek.

"But tonight... let me have this."

Jax looked at her.

Really looked.

At the woman who had risked everything on a stranger's kindness. Who had loved him despite every reason not to. Who was asking for nothing but a single moment.

One night.

'I should say no. I should walk away. I should—'

His hand moved on its own.

Cupping her face.

Wiping away her tears.

"You really are the most troublesome woman I've ever met."

She laughed. A broken, beautiful sound.

"Is that a yes?"

Jax sighed.

Then smiled.

That devilish, infuriating smile she had fallen for.

"One night."

Her eyes widened.

"But I'm warning you."

He leaned in.

Close enough that their lips almost touched.

"I don't do gentle."

Her breath hitched.

"It would hurt a little... being my first time."

She swallowed.

"But it's okay if it's you."

"You might regret this tomorrow."

"I already regret choosing you."

She closed the remaining distance.

Her lips touched his. Soft at first. Then deeper. Tasting everything.

And Jax's restraint snapped.

His hand tangled in her hair. Pulled her closer. Deepened the kiss with a hunger that surprised even him.

She tasted like tears and desperation and something sweeter underneath.

She moaned against his mouth.

Her hands clutched his shirt like she was drowning and he was air.

When they finally separated, both were breathing hard.

"Jax..."

Her voice was different now.

Thick with want.

"This dress."

"Take it off."

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