Chapter 134: Chapter 134: An Earnest Heart

’No, it wasn’t just my past life. I haven’t forgotten the way he looked at me as he stood by the river.’

’In my past life, he chose to look the other way. Why would he help me in this one?’

Liang Wan hesitated for a moment before asking, "That night, at the East Market, when I came out of Tongle Hall—"

He raised an eyebrow and smiled faintly. "Are you asking why I covered for you?"

Liang Wan looked into his eyes and nodded.

He studied her intently for a moment, then raised a hand to brush her temple. "Though I held a grudge against you, I... I was also curious. Why was the Wanwan before me so different from the one in my memory? What made her become so fierce and ruthless, daring to kill and commit arson? What made her willing to humble herself and desperately beg a man whose proposal she once rejected?"

’What was it?’

’Was it a life of misery and despair?’

Liang Wan’s lips curved into a smile, but her heart ached with a bittersweet sorrow that was hard to put into words.

Lu Xiu hadn’t expected an answer. He just watched her, his gaze unwavering. "I never thought that after not seeing you for so long, you would no longer be that bright, lovely porcelain doll. Instead, you’re like one that’s been shattered and pieced back together."

"I wanted to see if she would shatter at a touch, or if she was stronger than before."

"Later, as I spent more time with you, I slowly learned about some of the hidden circumstances. So, not only do I know there were many misunderstandings, but I also understand that we are both—"

He sighed and pulled her into his arms, his voice low. "If the young Lu Xiu adored that beautiful, lovely Wanwan, then the Lu Xiu of today—who is not the same man—feels a tender pity for the Wanwan before him, who is not the Wanwan she used to be."

Liang Wan narrowed her eyes but said nothing. She simply lay still against him, gentle and pliant in his arms, like in the dead of night.

A long silence fell. The room was quiet, just as it was at night. Whenever she pressed her ear to his chest, she could feel his heartbeat, a steady, hypnotic rhythm.

Lu Xiu’s sharp chin rested on the crown of her head. After a long moment, his voice sounded from above her.

"Didn’t you ask me if you resemble someone? Looking at this painting again, don’t you think there’s some resemblance?"

Liang Wan couldn’t refute it. While there was a faint facial similarity, the expression in her eyes was now a far cry from the person in the painting.

That was why, even though Zhou Yun had seen this painting countless times, he would never connect the person in it with her.

She was no longer that person, as pure and clear as water.

Lu Xiu was silent for a moment before sighing softly. "You said I let him discover us at the rockery on purpose. I can only say that I’m not entirely innocent."

"I’m no saint, and I’m not like Zhou Yun. He will give silently, asking for nothing in return. But me? I won’t just make you know everything—I demand that you be with me, and be the same as me."

He straightened her up, putting some distance between them. His ink-black eyes stared directly into hers. "From now on, you don’t have to wonder about any other motives I might have. There’s only one. I want you. All of you, body and soul."

His gaze was so resolute that she couldn’t help but feel a flicker of fear, the same fear that had taken root in her heart the day he had calmly and frankly told her the truth about her origins.

Bathed in such a gaze, there was nowhere to hide.

Liang Wan didn’t dare to look him in the eye.

"Any other questions?"

She had once told Lu Xiu that some questions were obsessions, and that once you had the answer, you should let them go.

But now, with so many answers, not only could she not let go, but it felt as if a giant net had been thrown over her head, trapping her completely.

Lu Xiu smoothed the stray hairs on her forehead. "We have plenty of time. There’s no rush. You can ask me again whenever you think of something."

’Plenty of time?’

Liang Wan furrowed her brow at him. "Then the three-year agreement..."

Lu Xiu lowered his hand and looked at her. "Three years as my concubine?"

Liang Wan stared into his eyes and nodded.

He tilted his head in thought, then gave a soft laugh. "That’s all up to you. After three years, whether you want to be my official wife or continue as my concubine, either is fine. Or, if you say you want to renounce the world and become a nun, I’ll just order someone to build a convent for you next to the back courtyard. That wouldn’t be difficult either. In any case, you’re the only one. What your official status is makes no difference to me."

’So, his ’three years’ actually meant...’

Liang Wan didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Perhaps noticing her conflicted expression, Lu Xiu added, "As for Cao Luyun, I have already been to the Cao Residence and made it clear to them. Considering the Cao Family’s current precarious situation, being under his suspicion, it would be unwise to defy the imperial decree. We will simply find an opportunity to divorce later. Of course, during her time as a guest in my residence, she will be a free woman."

"Therefore, regardless of whether any ’accidents’ happen on the wedding day, I will claim illness and not attend. So you don’t need to pin any of your schemes on me."

’Schemes?’

Liang Wan gave an embarrassed smile.

Lu Xiu paid it no mind, his brow furrowing as if he were thinking about something else.

’An expression that serious probably doesn’t bode well.’

Liang Wan instinctively didn’t want him to continue.

Just as she was about to speak, he looked over at her.

Lu Xiu glanced at her flushed cheeks. She looked frail. He said, "I’ve been walking and talking with you for a long time. I’m a bit tired. Let’s go back and rest."

Liang Wan silently breathed a sigh of relief.

Lu Xiu placed the painting back in its box and led her back to the bedchamber.

Though it wasn’t a long walk, she broke out in a light sweat.

For some reason, she recalled what Zhou Yun had said: Lu Xiu was a restrained and reserved person. If he didn’t want to reveal his thoughts, no one could get them out of him. And yet, before she even had to ask, he had told her everything.

’There was only fear, and more fear...’

’She used to think that deception was a terrifying thing.’

’But perhaps, more terrifying than concealment and deception, was absolute candor.’

Liang Wan glanced at the hand holding hers, then at the man before her, as elegant as drifting wind and swirling snow. She sighed heavily in her heart.

In all the time they had known each other, this was probably the most he had ever said to her at once.

Liang Wan lowered her gaze, no longer looking at him.

’No matter how different the two Lu Xius were, one thing remained the same.’

’He was a complete and utter madman!’

Five days later, once they had both fully recovered, Lu Xiu decided it was time to return to the Master’s Mansion.

They didn’t take much with them; she didn’t even have to pack. Even their freshly washed personal garments were left behind.

Liang Wan could tell that this place felt more like his home than the Master’s Mansion did.

Lu Xiu had told her that this villa was rebuilt on the foundation of Yuan Shaoyu’s former residence.

Yuan Shaoyu was his teacher, and also his father.

Liang Wan stood quietly in the courtyard. The autumn wind swept up fallen leaves, creating a bleak and lonely scene of parting.

She could almost imagine how he, as a young boy, had gotten along with the man he thought was his teacher, but who was, in fact, his father.

Ever since hearing Lu Xiu’s confession that day, she had felt flustered and lost. But in the days that followed, nothing seemed to have changed between them because of his words; everything was the same as before.

’And that was a good thing.’

Suddenly, a weight settled on her shoulders as a large cloak was draped over them.

Lu Xiu took her hand. "Let’s go."

Liang Wan turned her head and nodded.

These past few days of sickness had felt like a stolen moment of peace and tranquility. There were no schemes, no hatred. They could cast aside the affairs of the mortal world and be outsiders for a few days.

But in the end, they had to go back.

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