Chapter 1262: Chapter 1262: Only Upon Waking Does One Realize It Was a Dream

The Elder Qu Ping wandered, his soul lost and broken, walking to the banks of the Miluo River, his complexion haggard, his figure withered, his eyes likewise vacant.

At times he gazed at the river, at times at the distant mountains, at times at his own reflection cast upon the river’s surface.

Wherever his eyes fell, all things were stained with endless sorrow.

The sky, originally a clear blue with not a single cloud for ten thousand li, in an instant grew overcast and dim, and a fine, gloomy rain began to fall.

The distant mountains, originally as green as painted brows, suddenly lost all color and turned to gray.

The Miluo River, whose banks had once been scented with irises and orchids, suddenly lost all vitality. The river turned to a raging torrent, angry waves pounding the shore, just like the heart of the Elder Qu Ping at this moment—unable to find peace.

"Ai! How was it fine just now, and suddenly it starts to rain!" By the river there had been quite a few people of Chu fishing and working; seeing the change in the weather, they all ran to a grassy shed by the riverbank to take shelter from the rain.

The Elder Qu Ping, however, did not avoid the rain. Like some strange outcast, he stood in the downpour, utterly out of tune with the rest of the world.

Seeing this scene, among those hiding from the rain in the sheds, some let out mocking laughs, while others sighed again and again.

"Has this Sanlv Dafu really gone mad, just as the rumors say? It’s raining and yet he won’t take shelter, not even afraid of falling ill from the drenching."

"Mind your tongue! Sanlv Dafu is a noble of Chu... he is merely choked with grief; how dare you say he is deranged!"

"The news that Yingdu was broken struck him too hard..."

"Pitiful indeed. Had the late king but heeded the remonstrations of Sanlv Dafu, how would our Chu Country have come to this..."

"Hm? Look over there, there’s another little child who isn’t taking shelter, standing in the rain without even trying to avoid it. Could he be a fool as well?"

The little child they pointed at was in fact Ning Fan, who at this moment had taken the form of a child.

Ning Fan came ashore and walked slowly along the riverbank. Spray flung up by the torrent would now and then splash onto him, droplets striking his body, yet he did not brush them off.

The rain from the heavens beat down on him, and he did not evade it either, as though his body were merged with the Dao, as though he had blended into the Rain Intent between heaven and earth, as though this rain was already a part of his body.

The spray, the rain—both carried a chill. With Ning Fan’s cultivations, he still felt a thread of bone-deep cold.

What was truly cold was not the rain, not the water, but the Daoist Thought and sorrow steeped within them.

"So this man is the opponent in my Dao Thought Battle... This man’s Daoist Thought is very strong! His cultivations clearly have yet to step into the Firstly, pierce the body with the pin and draw the marks, yet the strength of his Daoist Thought faintly has already set foot into the Firstly, pierce the body with the pin and draw the marks..."

Ning Fan’s expression did not change, but inwardly he was somewhat astonished.

This old man before him, who looked so withered, so hopeless and grief-stricken, turned out to be such a formidable figure!

His cultivations had not entered the Firstly, pierce the body with the pin and draw the marks, yet his Daoist Thought already reached through heaven and earth!

"If this man were in his prime, even with all the advantages I hold in this battle of Daoist Thought, I would only have five parts chance of victory. Three parts would be a draw; the remaining two parts would be defeat..."

"A pity—nothing is more sorrowful than a heart that has died. This man’s heart is already dead, and so his Daoist Thought has lost all warmth. To defeat such a decayed Daoist Thought is no hard task..." Azure Spike flashed in Ning Fan’s eyes as he saw through the clues.

Though he still had not remembered who he was, he could still, by instinct, wield certain Divine Skills.

The Elder Qu Ping, as for Ning Fan in the distance, regarded him as if he were not there.

He had not remembered that he was at this moment within a Dao Thought Battle.

As for who he himself was, he recalled only half.

He remembered only the first half of his life, and could not recall the latter half.

The first half of his life, he was Qu Yuan, Sanlv Dafu of Chu Country, a criminal twice exiled.

Yet what crime had he really committed?

Hehe.

If loyalty and upright remonstrance are a crime, if refusing to wallow in filth with this foul world is a crime, then he truly is guilty beyond redemption.

In the past, he still harbored the extravagant hope that the king of Chu Country would suddenly awaken, would understand his loyalty, would be able to reverse the nation’s waning good fortune...

But now, none of that matters anymore.

The moment the capital of Chu Country was breached, his heart completely died.

The king abandoned the capital and fled in panic. Though Chu Country can still, for the moment, cling to a corner in precarious peace, from the instant the capital fell, the good fortune of the entire nation has been wholly seized by the Qin People.

The national fortune is lost, the destined span is at an end. This Divine Land will sooner or later fall into the hands of the Qin People; this is the mandate of Heaven, and to contend against it is far too difficult.

"What more can I do, what can I possibly do... Am I to offer up my body and die for the country? Hahaha, to die for the country—how easy that would be! So long as the king gives a single summons, even if Great Chu’s destined span is exhausted, I am still willing to follow by the king’s side and die with him!"

"Bearing a long sword and clasping a Qin bow, though my head be severed from my body, my heart will not be shamed!"

"For it is what my heart has always cherished; though I die nine times, I will not regret it!"

"What a pity! What a hatred! What a sorrow! Even now, the king has no need of me, regards me as no more than a blade of grass. My loyalty has always been but my own wishful thinking..."

The Elder Qu Ping’s grief grew ever more heavy, ever more desolate.

He walked along the riverbank like a madman.

Now sighing, now howling, now chanting verses of sorrow and heroic fervor.

In the distant sheds, some mocked him, some pitied him, some felt sorry for him, but no one understood him.

"Pitiful indeed. Sanlv Dafu’s health was never good to begin with; after being drenched by this rain, he’s grown even more deranged." From the sheds came sighs from time to time.

"Not good! Why is he drawing ever closer to the river’s edge? Could he be thinking of throwing himself into the river!" Some among them noticed the signs.

At once several sturdy men stood up, dashed out of the grassy shed, and tried to grab hold of the Elder Qu Ping to keep him from jumping into the river.

But they could not draw near!

The Elder Qu Ping’s Daoist Thought was too strong; mere mortal men, three or five in number, could not possibly pass through his layered Daoist Thought to approach his body.

That momentum of his was as though, if he wished to live, even Heaven could not make him die!

If he wished to die, even Heaven could not make him live!

Hehe, better to return! Better to return!

Ancestor Qu Ping stepped into the river one step at a time.

Seeing that the opponent in his Dao Thought Battle was actually seeking death of his own accord, Ning Fan was stunned at first, then sank into thought, and afterward his expression changed slightly as he strode forward, wanting to seize Qu Ping and keep this man from throwing himself into the river.

Why!

As it turned out, although Ancestor Qu Ping had not remembered that he was in a Dao Thought Battle, at this moment he had stirred up the intent to die, his entire Daoist Thought bent on seeking death. If he truly succeeded in dying, then Ning Fan would be considered defeated!

[This is the first layer of my Dao Thought, named Miluo!]

At this moment, Ning Fan seemed to be touched by something and recalled more matters; he remembered a sentence Ancestor Qu Ping had spoken before the Dao Thought Battle began.

Since this person had mentioned the Dao Thought First Layer, he must also have a Dao Thought Second Layer, and perhaps even a Third, Fourth... In other words, this Dao Thought Battle absolutely could not be only a single clash; there would very likely be multiple clashes.

What he now faced should be the first Dao Thought clash.

He must defeat this man’s intent to throw himself into the river!

Boom! Boom! Boom!

It was the sound of Ning Fan’s Daoist Thought violently colliding with the other’s Daoist Thought!

Ordinary people could not approach Ancestor Qu Ping, but Ning Fan could; he was forcing his way forward, bracing himself against Ancestor Qu Ping’s boundless Daoist Thought!

The momentum of this Daoist Thought confrontation was immense, yet ordinary people could not see this scene.

The Chu People in the thatched hut could only see a fisher-boy slowly walk toward Ancestor Qu Ping, and then feel the world between heaven and earth suddenly whipped by wild winds and filled with peals of thunder.

Strangely, however, not a trace of lightning was visible, and they secretly wondered if this thunder was coming from an extremely distant place.

The closer Ning Fan drew to Ancestor Qu Ping, the greater the obstruction from the Daoist Thought he faced.

The collision of the two men’s Daoist Thoughts also grew ever fiercer, actually showing signs of piercing through the heavens and earth of this realm!

If heaven and earth collapsed, this Dao Thought Battle would likely end in a draw.

"Hmph! You trifling heavens and earth, have I allowed you to collapse!" Seeing that this Dao Thought Battle was very likely to be forcibly drawn because of the collapse of heaven and earth, there was one person who was displeased.

In the distance, Old Han stood upon a fishing boat, face full of displeasure as he glared at the heavens and the earth; with a single glance, the Yin and Yang Qi between heaven and earth was forcibly locked down, compelling the world to be unable to break apart.

"With that little brat Ning’s temperament, he would never be willing for this Dao Thought Battle to end like this..." Old Han muttered to himself, in truth somewhat puzzled inside, not understanding why he understood Ning Fan’s temperament so well.

Ten steps remained.

Nine steps.

Eight steps.

Ning Fan drew ever closer to Ancestor Qu Ping.

Though Ancestor Qu Ping’s Daoist Thought was strong, it could not prevent his approach!

Three steps.

Two steps.

One step.

Ning Fan finally arrived in front of Ancestor Qu Ping, also stepping into the river, and he grabbed hold of Ancestor Qu Ping.

Almost at the very instant Ning Fan stopped Ancestor Qu Ping from casting himself into the river, the two Daoist Thoughts that had been clashing in the heavens and earth ceased their collision.

A winner was decided.

Ning Fan won.

But it could only be counted as winning one round.

The contest of this Dao Thought Battle was by no means limited to this one round before his eyes; a momentary lead could not determine that Ning Fan would be the final victor.

"Child, why do you stop me?" Ancestor Qu Ping asked in surprise.

He himself seemed not to realize that he had inadvertently unleashed boundless Daoist Thought, much less that Ning Fan had engaged in a Dao Thought Battle with him.

He remembered nothing.

Everything had happened in an unconscious state.

"Just by unconsciously releasing Daoist Thought, he is already this overpowering; if this man were fully conscious, and his spirit sense not dead, what sort of bearing would he have then..." Ning Fan suppressed the heaviness in his heart.

Since the other party at this time did not remember him as an opponent, he would not take the initiative to reveal his identity either.

He cupped his hands politely, as if he truly were just an ordinary fisher-boy, and countered, "Are you not the Sanlv Dafu? Why have you come here to seek death?"

Obviously, Ning Fan had heard the passersby discussing Ancestor Qu Ping and had learned of this man’s identity as Sanlv Dafu.

This sentence was no more than an ordinary question.

Yet this sentence caused the confusion in Ancestor Qu Ping’s eyes to deepen, as if he suddenly felt a sense of being separated by lifetimes.

It was as though, a very, very long time ago, this same scene had already occurred, and someone had once raised a similar question when he went to the river to seek death.

[Are you not the Sanlv Dafu? Why have you come to such a pass?]

How strange.

"Child, you are still young; you do not yet understand how harsh the ways of the world are. There is a kind of suffering more excruciating than death, and that is: when the whole world is turbid and I alone am clear, when all men are drunk and I alone am awake..."

Ning Fan’s brows knit slightly.

He had thought he had already defeated the other’s intent to throw himself into the river, yet he now discovered that from the opponent’s words, there was still an undiminished will to die.

His earlier victory had actually failed to leave the slightest crack in Ancestor Qu Ping’s spirit sense; it had not even caused the least wavering in this man’s heart.

"What is it to be drunk? What is it to be awake?" Ning Fan was silent for a moment, then suddenly asked.

Qu Ping started and looked Ning Fan over carefully, as though curious why Ning Fan had asked this question.

Seeing Ning Fan’s face full of seriousness, not as if he were asking on a whim, Qu Ping suddenly felt it was rather curious and, rarely, had a bit of interest in conversation. "In ancient times there was a unicorn child named Xiang Tuo, who at seven years of age could be a teacher to the Saints. Looking at you now, you too seem not to be an ordinary child. With this question of yours, I fear you wish to debate me a bit. Since that is so, I shall chat idly with you for a while, and then go seek death."

"You ask me what it means to be drunk, what it means to be sober? Your question reminds me of certain memories."

"When I was young and traveled to study, I once passed by Yunmeng Marsh and encountered a certain God. At that time this God was drinking in the clouds, shining together with the sun and moon. I was delighted to see a God and went forward to seek teachings on the Dao, but this God did not speak much to me. He merely descended from the clouds, came over with his wine, pointed at the wine in his cup, and replied, ’All the living beings, drunk in life, dreaming in death,’ then drifted away."

"Back then, I did not understand. But now, I vaguely understand a little. Drunkenness is life; dream is death. There are People of the Netherworld who dwell in the endlessly distant Dreamland Realm, long dead and never living; and there are countless Immortals and Gods of the Real Realms, long living and never dying, yet all their lives they live in drunkenness, never truly waking up... Some are unable to wake, and some simply go with the flow, unwilling to wake. My answer, might it satisfy you?"

Qu Yuan replied.

His expression revealed infinite yearning, as if recalling scene after scene of that day he met that God.

"I am not satisfied." Ning Fan shook his head.

"Why?"

"Because that is the answer of that God in the clouds, not yours. Since you assert that you are sober while all beings are drunk, you must have your own judgment."

"Hehe, what a clever little fellow. It seems I cannot brush you off with a few casual words." Qu Yuan gave a bitter smile.

It seemed that today, he would have to spend some words on this child.

"Little brother, have you ever seen a drunkard? The more drunk one is, the more he insists he is not drunk—that is true drunkenness; and there are some who are clearly sober, yet for various reasons deliberately act drunk, making it hard to tell. The human heart is inscrutable; who is truly drunk, who is falsely drunk—how can one see through it with just a pair of eyes? Forgive my previous presumption. When I said I was sober and all beings were drunk, that was probably just my own drunken rambling. As for sobriety, I do not know what true sobriety is, nor do I know who is truly sober; even whether I myself am sober or drunk is hard to judge. Perhaps only after dying once can one understand the truth... Does this answer satisfy you?"

"It will do."

"Only ’will do’? Little brother’s demands are truly strict." Qu Yuan smiled casually, not taking it to heart.

"Because these are still half true, half false, and still not the words of your heart." Ning Fan could Communicate with All Things and could roughly hear whether a person was speaking from his heart.

"Oh? Little friend seems to know me quite well. According to little friend, what then are the words of my heart?" Qu Yuan was greatly amazed; this time, he truly took the child before him as an equal.

"You are not someone who knows that all beings are drunk while you alone are sober; you merely believe it so. After all, this is a world where, if you believe, it exists!" Ning Fan’s words were like a thunderclap exploding in Qu Yuan’s heart.

His gaze trembled; in all his life, this was the first time someone had directly laid bare his inner heart!

"Hmm? Looking closely, little friend seems somewhat familiar. Have we met somewhere..." Qu Yuan asked doubtfully.

"Perhaps." Ning Fan naturally would not take the initiative to say, I am your opponent in the Dao Thought Battle.

Instead he asked, "What is purity? What is filth?"

"The method says, the pure rises, the turbid sinks. This heaven is pure. This earth is turbid." Qu Yuan replied.

"That is not what you truly think." Ning Fan shook his head.

"Yet it is what the world thinks. If the entire world holds such a thought, of what use is my single thought?" Qu Yuan countered.

"If your Dao differs from theirs, must you seek your own death?" Ning Fan.

"If our Dao differs, I would rather die!" Qu Yuan.

"Oh? Hearing your words, I sense a streak of obsession. So that’s how it is—what you cultivate, Fellow Daoist, is the Path of Obsession!" With a round of probing, Ning Fan seemed to confirm something.

So, the Elder Qu Yuan before him was also a Holder Cultivator, a stubborn man who would rather break than bend.

"If you do not fear death, why fear life?" He was trying to persuade Qu Yuan to let go of his desire for death.

"Is little friend going to debate with me which is superior, life or death? If so, the topic may stray too far. Let us continue to speak of purity and filth instead." Qu Yuan smiled.

This smile, however, came truly from the heart; he was pleased to have encountered a true Fellow Daoist.

"I would like to hear your illustrious view." Ning Fan nodded and no longer spoke of life and death.

The rain in the sky grew heavier.

The two returned to the shore, sat directly on the ground in the pouring rain, assuming the posture of sitting and discussing the Dao.

"Since Fellow Daoist wishes to hear my view, I shall speak. What is purity, what is filth—the answer has been written there from the very beginning, has it not? Pure or turbid, what we speak of is all water. This water is purity; this water is filth as well." As he spoke, Qu Yuan pointed at the Miluo River.

"When this river is calm and windless, the water runs clear; when the winds and waves rise, the mud and sand churn, and it becomes muddy water. Water is utmost purity yet also utmost filth; the Dao is the same."

"Water has the two aspects of purity and filth, and so does the Dao. This heaven can be heaven; but if Heaven and Earth overturn, what is called heaven will become earth."

"The pure rises, not because it is pure that it rises, but because once it has risen to heaven, it is then named pure. Forgive my previous presumption. I said the whole world was turbid while I alone was pure; the truth may be exactly the opposite. In the eyes of the world, perhaps only us Holder Cultivators are the filth of this world! Hahaha!"

"What is purity!"

"Purity is self-purifying!"

The rain poured down harder and harder.

Qu Yuan, however, laughed loudly in the storm, appearing almost mad, prompting repeated sighs from the people within the thatched hut.

"It seems Sanlv Dafu has truly gone mad..."

"I have yet to ask Fellow Daoist’s view. What do you think is purity, and what is filth?" After laughing, Qu Yuan turned and questioned Ning Fan.

"I already stated my view. Has Fellow Daoist forgotten? This is a world where, if you believe, it exists." Ning Fan smiled.

"Hahaha! Those words are excellent! We should drain a great cup in one go!" Qu Yuan grew even happier, regarding the child before him with a look of kindred appreciation.

What he looked at was not the child.

But the soul hidden beneath the child’s body.

So this is the Ancient Great Cultivator Zhao Jian, famed across Ning Fan? Truly a remarkable man!

After a round of conversation, Qu Yuan had already recalled everything. And Ning Fan too, in this clash, remembered it all.

This was originally a Dao Thought Battle that required a life-and-death outcome, yet now, neither Qu Yuan nor Ning Fan was willing to continue fighting.

An old man and a fisher boy sat by the river, conversing in the rain, in unspeakable harmony.

"Do you have any wine?" Qu Yuan asked Ning Fan.

"In a Dao Thought Battle, one cannot carry wine." Ning Fan smiled.

"No matter, that is easily handled." Qu Yuan rose and walked toward the nearby thatched hut, and asked the men inside.

"Gentlemen, do you have wine? Lend me a pot?"

"We only have realgar wine for driving off insects and dispelling poison..." A few men were afraid Qu Yuan would go mad; helpless, they lent him a jug.

"Do you have any cups?" Qu Yuan asked again.

"Just a few cracked bowls..."

"Cracked bowls are enough. Lend me this wine and these bowls, and in the next life I’ll repay you all with a stroke of good fortune!" Qu Yuan’s gaze swept over them; seeing that they had slight karma with him in their next lives, he spoke with solemn thanks.

"Cough, cough, it’s just a bit of wine, how could it be worthy of such thanks from Sanlv Dafu!" the men said with wry smiles.

All that talk of next lives and such, they didn’t believe a word of that ridiculous nonsense.

Wasn’t it just Sanlv Dafu freeloading a jug of wine?

Besides, this Dafu was planning to kill himself anyway; they might as well treat this jug as his farewell drink. If they angered this mad Dafu, who knew if he’d come back to pester them after turning into a ghost... hss, just thinking about it made their backs go cold.

So there was wine, but this wine happened to be realgar wine used to repel insects and detoxify.

There were vessels too, but they happened to be a few cracked bowls, still stained with mud.

Yet in Ning Fan’s eyes, this round of drinking was incomparably precious.

"You are an Ancient Great Cultivator, the karma on your body is unimaginably heavy. Just to invite me for a drink, you granted several people karma—aren’t you afraid it will affect your Taoist?" Ning Fan sighed.

Even Quasi-Saints fear worldly karma like venomous snakes and scorpions, let alone an Ancient Great Cultivator.

Qu Yuan stroked his white beard and only smiled without answering; as host, he naturally ought to fulfill his duty, and had already taken the initiative to pour wine for Ning Fan.

"Many thanks for the wine, host." Ning Fan did not care about the filth on the bowl; he picked it up and drained it in one gulp.

"You are too courteous, Fellow Daoist. It is I who should be thanking you. Discussing Dao with you today has been greatly satisfying; the depression in my chest is much eased. It’s just a pity that this meeting is all an illusion within a Dao Thought Battle. Had I met you back then, perhaps I would not have chosen to throw myself into the river..."

As his emotion rose, Qu Yuan actually unfastened the sword at his waist and plucked its strings in song.

"When I enter I say nothing, when I leave I take no leave,

Riding the returning wind, I bear the cloud-borne banners.

No sorrow is deeper than parting in life,

No joy is greater than meeting a new kindred soul."

When the song ended, Qu Yuan rose, cast his longsword into the Miluo River, and said free and easy, "This battle, I lost."

He had actually taken the initiative to concede defeat in the Dao Thought Battle!

"Our Dao Thought Battle has only just entered the first clash; how can you speak of victory or defeat so lightly?" Ning Fan frowned.

After a round of discussion and a jug of wine, he genuinely thought well of this Elder Qu Ping. If it were someone else taking the initiative to concede, he would happily take a free win, but he was unwilling to gain even the slightest advantage over Elder Qu Ping.

"You were able to defeat me on the Dao Thought First Layer; that is your first victory."

"You saw through my true spirit sense several times; that is your second victory."

"When even the spirit sense I hid deepest cannot be concealed from you, how can my Daoist Thought possibly triumph over yours? You would easily find a flaw and shatter it. I might as well concede of my own accord and avoid the humiliation."

"Those are not the words in your heart." Ning Fan shook his head.

"Hahaha, as expected, I can hide nothing from you. Just as you guessed, besides the first layer, the Miluo’s Intent, my Daoist Thought has a second layer, Li Sao’s Intent, and a third layer, Nine Songs’ Intent."

"This is Li Sao’s Intent."

Elder Qu Ping’s Daoist Thought suddenly changed.

His Daoist Thought no longer had the slightest chill; in an instant it became unfathomable in Yin and Yang.

Under its influence, the scenery of heaven and earth changed once more.

The downpour stopped; in the gloomy sky there appeared the anomaly of sun and moon shining together.

And then countless colossal stars emerged between heaven and earth; in a moment, the stars began to transform, actually turning into characters of the stars, each glyph hanging in the air!

In total, more than two thousand eight hundred star characters!

They emanated an unimaginable aura of Daoist Thought!

Like an ancient Dao Scripture, they circled in the sky, with supreme traces diffusing upon them.

"With this Li Sao’s Intent, I dare to fight even an Initial Saint. It’s a pity that you know my spirit sense and breaking this intent wouldn’t be too difficult for you—what use is it then?"

With that, Qu Yuan withdrew his Daoist Thought and did not continue to display the third layer.

"Why not reveal the Nine Songs’ Intent?" Ning Fan asked.

"That Daoist Thought I am still cultivating; I cannot yet control it freely. If I were to use it, even if a Saint maintained this place for us, I fear we still could not fight to a clear outcome—the world would collapse regardless, and this realm would only end in a draw... If we moved outside and employed that intent, the destruction would be too great; likely half of Ning Fan would collapse under its power. You and I are not mortal enemies—there is no need to fight to that extent..."

Not only were they not mortal enemies, they were excellent drinking companions, hahaha!

That was the truth in his heart.

But Elder Qu Ping did not say it out loud.

Though he did not say it, Ning Fan could read it clearly and could only shake his head helplessly. "Even though you did not use the Nine Songs’ Intent, I can still discern a few clues and know how formidable it is. Let’s say that today’s battle between the two of us ends in a draw."

And so, a Dao Thought Battle that had come on fiercely ended in such a damp squib.

Once the Dao Thought Battle ended, Ning Fan could naturally no longer remain in this realm.

He did not even have time to say farewell to Old Han; his Daoist Thought gave a whoosh and vanished without a trace.

"Brat, you actually left without even saying goodbye!" Old Han cursed under his breath, yet in his heart he felt an inexplicable sense of loss.

Strange, strange!

He had clearly only met some somewhat pleasing brat in a dream—off by just a hair from taking him as a disciple—so why did that fellow’s departure make him this reluctant to part?

Could it be that this old man has reached the age where a master’s love overflows?

Ah well, when I wake from this dream, I’ll go take on a few pleasing disciples and add some life to Liangyi Sect.

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