Chapter 909: I Am In So Much Pain That I Am Dying
But after he spat out the word okay, he felt like a huge part of his heart was missing. It was just as if something very very important slipped through his fingers.
He was in great pain.
“How about you? When will you get married to Han Xuan?” she asked softly.
Zhou Yao closed his long eyelashes, then he tugged on the corners of his lips as he said, “I don’t know… Probably very soon…”
“Oh. Han Xuan, although she is a little extreme, but the feelings that she has for you are real. After you get married, you should…live a proper life together with her…”
Zhou Yao had a look off in the distance. The sunset was already gone, and it was night time. His time together with her was coming to a close; it was time for them to bid farewell.
He lowered his head to firmly kiss her forehead. He closed his eyes as he smiled and said, “Wifey, in the past four months with you, I was very happy and very satisfied, but I have a regret. It is…that child we lost…”
Leng Zhiyuan was nested on his shoulders. Her expression became very depressed, and that child would forever be a pain in her heart.
“If that child were still around, would you wish for him to be a girl or boy…” She lifted her small head up to ask him.
Zhou Yao bent his body down to peck her red lips and murmured to her, “I am fine with both. I like them both…but I have a very strong feeling that we would have had a boy…”
“Hah, really?”
“Yeah, a son. Now, I have changed my mind. After giving birth to our son, we would not have to dump him over to my mother to bring him up. We could totally raise him on our own. We’d move out and have a house that belongs to us completely. Wifey, you would be a good Mummy. In the day, you would be at home taking care of the kids. At night, I’d come back early. I’d cook, then I would help you to take care of the child, and after making him go to bed, we would have our personal time. I would pamper you well…”
“Zhou Yao!” Leng Zhiyuan laughed as she cut him off.
“Shh, don’t say anything. I have yet to finish speaking…”
Leng Zhiyuan stretched her small hand out to block his thin lips. Her eyes were all bright and moist as she raised her gaze to look at him, and she said, “Zhou Yao, don’t say anymore. The car has arrived to pick us up.”
Zhou Yao slowly turned his gaze over to the side. There was a black car parked diagonally in front of them, and the car drove over from the lane.
Zhou Yao had a few glances, and he cast his gaze down. He knew that this car had been there a long time, but he was unwilling to look to the side to look at it. He was unwilling to accept reality.
But, reality was still reality at the end of the day.
…
The black car slowly went down the hill before it cruised onto the main road, and they went back to T City.
Xiao Zhi looked through the rear view mirror at the two people in the back seat. Zhou Yao and Leng Zhiyuan were seated quietly. They still maintained the same position they were in on the lawn on the peak of the mountain. Zhou Yao stretched his arms out to cup Leng Zhiyuan’s slim waist, and Leng Zhiyuan was nested on his broad shoulders.
Neither of them said anything. Actually, there was nothing much to say. Everything that could be addressed and reminded had all been said. They’d already said everything.
In the last moments, they did not want to say anything and just wanted to hug each other quietly and feel each other’s warm heartbeats, then it would be all fine.
After a few hours, the car stopped in T City.
Leng Zhiyuan turned her gaze over to have a look out of the window. They were here. She did not turn her head back, but she stretched her hand out directly to open the back door of the car, and she wanted to get out.
But her left hand was being tightly held in a large palm.
He grabbed her and did not want to let her leave.
This was his way of asking her to stay.
Leng Zhiyuan’s eyes were full of tears again. She did not dare to turn her head back. She was afraid that she would go soft, but if they continued to be like that, both of them would only be in more pain. She raised her gaze and used force to slowly withdraw her small hand as she said, “Zhou Yao, goodbye!”
This time, they were really bidding farewell to one another.
She got out of the car.
Ah Chen had been there a long time. He parked the luxury car to pick Leng Zhiyuan up.
Ah Chen opened the back door, and Leng Zhiyuan sat inside quickly as she said, “Drive.”
“Yes, Young Miss.”
After that, Zhou Yao watched the woman’s back profile and the car disappeared from his line of sight. His line of sight was empty, and his entire world became grey.
“Major General,” Xiao Zhi said carefully, “We… Where are we going?”
By the time he finished speaking, Zhou Yao had already opened the door and walked out.
“Major General!” Xiao Zhi noticed that Zhou Yao wanted to leave. He hurriedly opened the door of the driver’s seat to chase after him, but Zhou Yao did not leave. The man was tall and burly as he stood by the side of the door. His back was facing Xiao Zhi, and Xiao Zhi watched him take his phone from his pocket.
That’s right. Zhou Yao took his phone out. He wanted to make a call.
Actually, he had many things that he wanted to tell her.
…
Leng Zhiyuan’s phone rang; he was calling her.
She lowered her gaze to look at that extremely familiar number on the screen. Leng Zhiyuan was frozen for a few seconds, then she pressed the button to answer the call.
“Hello, Wifey…” The man’s hurried and hoarse voice rang out from the other end as he said, “Don’t hang up. I have something to tell you. Actually, I’ve wanted to tell you this for a long time. If I do not tell you right now, I do not know whether I will have the chance to do so anymore…
“Wifey, can we take back all of the words that we said on the peak of the mountain? Don’t have another man. I do not want to have Han Xuan. Is it okay just to have each other? I really do not want anyone else. I also want to wish you well, but it is okay if you say that I am selfish or pathetic. I do not want to wish you well. I don’t want you to have another man. I want you to only belong to me. I will also belong to you…”
“I do not know what I should say. If we could do this over again, I would never live like that… At 16, even if I died, I would not accept Han Hong’s help. I would not want him to block the bullet for me. I would not want to get to know Han Xuan…
“I did not know that I would be able to meet you in life. If I’d known, I would’ve made myself life freely and independently. If I’d known, I would definitely have left a complete version of myself for you…
“I never knew that I have led my life to such a horrible state. I am sorry, Wifey. I am sorry. From the moment I saw Han Xuan jump, I did not have any other choice. I was not able to get over this in my heart. I am unable to get over that step… I am very tired. I am really so tired. I do not know what to do right now.
“Wifey, I said that I would never let go of your hand. Now, I still do not want to let go… I never asked what Heavens wanted before. This life of mine, it has been serving the people, but right now, I want it now. I only want to have you. Why? Why is it so difficult for us to be together?
“I know that I do not have any right to ask anything from you, and I am unable to ignore Han Xuan, but, but can you… Don’t leave me. Can you…be by my side? I know that right now, I am unable to give anything to you. If you continue to be together with me, it would be very very hard on you, but, Wifey, what do you want me to do? As I watch you leave, my heart hurts very very much… I am in so much pain that I am almost dying…”
On a night in early spring like this, the sky was already very dark. Only the lights on the side of the road gave off a faint glow. Xiao Zhi stood just like that. He stood behind Zhou Yao. He looked on as the man clenched the phone in his hand and murmured painfully. He looked on as the tall man tried hard to raise his head up, but there were still two streams of tears flowing from the corners of his eyes.
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