My Dungeon Daddy System: Raising Monsters and Waifus Underground

Chapter 70 – The Reed-Brand 2.0


Reed woke up in a predicament that defied physics, biology, and the structural integrity of the human spine. He couldn't see the ceiling. He saw darkness. Specifically, he saw the inside of a Harpy's wing, which was draped over his face like a feathered sleep mask.

He tried to inhale and tasted feathers. He tried to move his legs but found them encased in concrete. No, not concrete. Stone. Terra was acting as the base of the pile, her massive granite legs locking him in place against her warm, magma-heated torso.

He tried to shift his left arm. It was pinned under a heavy, muscular coil of emerald scales. Seraphine had claimed his left side, her tail wound tight around his waist in a possessive constrictor knot. He tried to shift his right arm and felt a wet, rhythmic pulsing. Luma was puddle-sleeping on his bicep, her gelatinous form rising and falling with his pulse.

And somewhere near his collarbone, a small, sharp knee was digging into him. Grika. The goblin was drooling slightly on his velvet coat, muttering something about "torque" in her sleep.

"System," Reed whispered into the feathers. "Status report."

[STATUS: HAREM CRITICAL]

Airflow: Restricted (Feather Density High).

Temperature: Tropical/Magma.

Dignity: Non-existent.

Mana: 100% (Stabilized).

Buff: [Post-Nut Clarity (Magical)].

Reed groaned. The "Group Decompression" session in the Pizza Forge had worked. Perhaps too well. The Shadow Rot, that gnawing, frantic hunger that drove his staff to madness, was gone. In its place was a heavy, contented silence, broken only by the sound of seven women snoring in different pitches.

It was peaceful. It was warm. It was the most dangerous moment of his life.

CLICK.

A number ticked over in his internal clock.

[TIME: 05:45 AM]

[EVENT: DAWN]

[QUEST: THE BRIDGE PAYMENT]

[STATUS: CRITICAL FAILURE IMMINENT]

Reed's eyes snapped open beneath the wing.

The Dwarves.

Reed shoved the Harpy wing aside. Riva squawked indignantly in her sleep, tightening her talons in his hair before settling back down.

"Kaelen," Reed hissed.

He looked down. The High Inquisitor was slumped against his chest, wedged between Maira's shoulder and Grika's foot. Her blonde hair was a bird's nest. Her white tabard was rumpled and stained with soot. She had a drop of drool on her cheek.

And in her hand, crumpled slightly but still legible, was the Bank Draft for 6,500 Gold.

She hadn't left. She had succumbed to the "Steam" high, the addictive reaction between his Void Mana and her Holy Aura, and passed out in the pile.

"Kaelen!" Reed whispered louder, trying to shake her without waking the sleeping dragons (literally) around him.

She didn't stir. She just nuzzled deeper into his shirt, smiling a goofy, intoxicated smile.

"So warm," she mumbled. "Smells like... heresy."

Reed checked the time again. 05:46.

He didn't have a choice. He needed to extract the Paladin from the Monster Pile without triggering a chain reaction of violence.

"Forgive me," Reed muttered.

He activated his aura. Just a pulse.

[SKILL: OVERLORD SHOCK]

[Target: Kaelen]

[Intensity: Gentle Wake-Up Call]

Violet electricity crackled from his skin into hers.

"GAH!" Kaelen jerked awake.

Chaos ensued.

Kaelen flailed, her armored elbow hitting Grika in the ear. Grika woke up screaming "EXPLOSION!" and triggered her static discharge. BZZZT. The shock traveled through Reed, into Seraphine. The Lamia hissed, her instincts kicking in, and she tightened her coil, turning Reed's waist into a corset. Luma panicked and dissolved into a literal wave of blue slime, soaking everyone.

"Alert!" Maira snapped upright, her glasses crooked, grabbing her clipboard from thin air. "Status! Who breached the perimeter?!"

"Nobody breached!" Reed shouted, gasping for air as Seraphine squeezed the life out of him. "Sera! Release! Kaelen! Run!"

Kaelen scrambled out of the pile, slipping on the fresh slime coating the floor. She looked around wild-eyed, clutching the Bank Draft to her chest. She saw the monsters waking up. She saw Reed, covered in feathers and slime, pinned by a snake woman.

"The Dwarves!" Kaelen shrieked. "Oh gods, the Dwarves!"

"Go!" Reed commanded, pointing a slime-covered finger at the door. "You have fourteen minutes to get to the gorge!"

Kaelen didn't argue. She didn't even adjust her armor. She turned and sprinted, her metal boots clanging against the stone floor, a blur of white and silver panic.

"I will purge this lateness!" she yelled as she vanished down the hallway.

Reed slumped back against Terra, who yawned, creating a sound like a cavern collapsing.

"TINY BOSS IS LOUD," Terra rumbled, patting Reed's head with a hand the size of a shovel. "SLEEP MORE."

"No sleep," Reed sighed, wiping blue goo off his face. "We have a bridge to build. And I think we're about to be very, very broke."

[ 5 DAYS LATER]

The next five days were a blur of noise, dust, and Dwarven profanity.

From the lobby using his Riva as birdvision as she circled the sky, Reed watched the construction with the grim satisfaction of a man watching his bank account drain in real-time.

Day 1: The gold arrived. Guild Master Thrain bit every single coin before shouting orders. The sound of pickaxes hitting stone echoed through the valley like thunder.

Day 2: The pylons rose. Massive pillars of reinforced granite, carved with runes that glowed a steady, industrial orange.

Day 3: The steel span. It wasn't human steel. It was Dwarven alloy, dark and heavy, lowered into place by cranes that defied gravity.

Day 4: The connection. The final slab was laid, connecting the isolated "dungeon of D-0731" to the main road leading to Stonebridge. The magical isolation ward flickered and died, replaced by a physical tether to the world.

Day 5: Silence.

Reed stood at the opening of the dungeon as the first light of dawn hit the newly finished bridge. It was magnificent. It was sturdy. It was wide enough for a carriage, or a siege engine, depending on the day.

Footsteps approached from behind. They were heavy, metallic, but tired.

Kaelen joined him at the entrance. She looked exhausted. She was back in her pristine Inquisitor uniform, but there were dark circles under her eyes. The "Mana Hangover" had faded, replaced by the crushing weight of logistics.

"It is done," Kaelen said, her voice flat. She handed him a piece of parchment.

Reed took it. It was a receipt.

[TRANSACTION COMPLETE]

[Service: Bridge Repair (Class A)]

[Cost: 6,500 Gold]

[Balance: 0 Gold]

"We are destitute," Reed noted, staring at the zero.

"We are connected," Kaelen corrected, leaning to her side. She didn't stand at attention. She slumped slightly, letting her shoulder brush against his arm. She didn't pull away. "The trade route is open. The merchants and adventurers are already lining up. You have your highway, Lord Reed."

"And you have your tax revenue stream," Reed countered.

"If you make any money," Kaelen murmured. She looked down at the bridge. "You spent everything on the infrastructure. How do you plan to pay the operating costs? The magical lighting alone costs 50 mana a day. The food imports? The linen service for the spa?"

Reed folded the receipt and put it in his pocket. He looked out at the horizon, where the dust of approaching wagons was already visible.

"We pivot," Reed said, his eyes glowing a faint violet. "We stop hunting Whales. Whales are rare, Kaelen. You can't build an economy on winning the lottery every week. We need volume."

He turned away from the sunrise.

"Staff meeting in ten minutes. I have a pitch."

THE WAR ROOM (Formerly the Pizza Forge)

The Senior Staff sat around the black obsidian table. The mood was significantly more professional than the cuddle pile from five days ago, though Luma was still sitting in a bucket to maintain her shape.

Maira had her new ledger. Seraphine was polishing her spear. Grika was rewiring a slot machine that seemed to be humming a sea shanty.

"Status report," Reed began, standing at the head of the table. "The bridge is open. We are accessible. This is good news."

"The bad news," Maira interjected, adjusting her glasses, "is that our liquidity is absolute zero. We cannot buy ingredients for the pizza. We cannot buy oil for the machines. We cannot even buy polish for the skeletons."

"We need loot!" Grika yelled, banging a wrench on the table. "Let's rob a caravan!"

"No robbery," Reed said. "We are a legitimate business. Mostly… Lets save that for another act"

He picked up a piece of chalk and drew a pyramid on the chalk board. He drew a line down the middle.

"We are implementing the Two-Tier Economy," Reed announced.

He pointed to the top of the pyramid.

TIER 1: THE RESORT

Target: Nobles, Merchants, "Whales."

Product: The Casino, The Spa, The Arena.

Currency: Gold.

Risk: Low.

"This is what we built for Valerius," Reed explained. "High luxury. Safe. Expensive. We keep this running for the VIPs. Maira, this is your domain. You milk them dry with fees, drinks, and bad odds."

Maira nodded, a small, cruel smile playing on her lips. "I shall adjust the house edge to... predatory levels."

Reed pointed to the bottom of the pyramid. The base.

TIER 2: THE GRIND

Target: Adventurers, Mercenaries, "Farmers."

Product: Violence, Loot, XP.

Currency: Mana (Blue) & gold.

Risk: High.

"This," Reed tapped the board, "is our bread and butter. The adventurers. The ones who want to hit things. They don't want a spa day. They want to kick down a door, kill a skeleton, and find a cool sword."

Seraphine perked up. Her tail twitched. "Violence?" she purred.

"Controlled violence," Reed clarified. "We open Floor 1 as a 'Classic Dungeon.' We stock it with the Hive Mind minions, the skeletons, the orcs. We set up traps. We let them raid us."

"You want them to win?" Seraphine narrowed her eyes. "You want me to let them beat my soldiers?"

"I want them to think they can win," Reed smiled. "We gamify it. Grika?"

The goblin hopped up on her chair. "Way ahead of you, Boss! I've been working on the RNG Traps! The 'Hall of Hands' is ready. Instead of just killing them, the traps roll a dice! Sometimes they get a potion. Sometimes they get slapped by a giant mechanical hand! It's psychological warfare!"

"Exactly," Reed said. "We charge an entry fee. We let them grind the skeletons for XP. They generate Blue Mana from the excitement and fear. We use the Blue Mana to pay the taxes. We use the Gold from the Casino to pay the bills."

"It is... a mullet strategy," Kaelen muttered from the back of the room.

Reed blinked. "A what?"

"Business in the front, party in the back," Kaelen explained, looking incredibly embarrassed that she knew that phrase. "It is a Dwarven term."

"Sure," Reed laughed. "A Mullet Strategy. We run two dungeons in one. The front pays the rent. The back feeds the Core."

He looked at his staff. They looked ready. Stabilized, hungry, and armed with new uniforms.

"The bridge is open," Reed said, his voice dropping to a command growl. "The first wave of rookies is already crossing. I can feel them. Lena's party. They're coming back."

He looked at Grika.

"Is the Loot Box system online?"

Grika grinned, her sharp teeth glinting. She held up a remote detonator.

"Oh yeah. The payout rate is abysmal. They're gonna love it."

"Then let's open the doors," Reed said. "Welcome to the Grind."

[SYSTEM ALERT]

[NEW ERA STARTED: THE TWO-TIER ECONOMY]

[Income Stream 1: The Casino (Active)]

[Income Stream 2: The Dungeon (Active)]

[Current Gold: 0]

[Projected Income: High]

Reed dismissed the notification. He felt a vibration in the floor. Faint. Rhythmic.

Thump-thump.

It wasn't the construction. It wasn't the slot machines.

It was coming from below. From beneath the Iron Works.

"Maira," Reed said quietly, the smile fading from his face. "Keep an eye on the seismic monitors for Floor 3."

"Sir?" Maira paused, her pen hovering over the ledger.

"Just a hunch," Reed murmured, touching his chest where Elara was sleeping. "But I have a sinking feeling something big's about to happen."

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