"Yo! What is going on here? Why is there so much noise coming from this specific table?"
Alex shouted this out loud as he finally reached the wooden table. He didn't just stand there. He reached out his hand and slapped Lloyd heavily on the back.
Whack!
Poor Lloyd almost choked on his own spit. He looked terrified. Alex ignored him and pulled out a wooden chair. He spun the chair around so the back was facing the front—the cool way to sit—and he sat down with a thud.
"You guys are acting louder than a pack of wolves fighting over a piece of meat! Seriously, people are looking!"
Juliana stopped her screaming immediately. She froze. She turned her fierce eyes towards Alex. She looked like she wanted to bite his head off.
"Hmph. The dead weight finally decided to show up," Lisander said. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked away. He acted like he didn't care at all. He was trying so hard to be cool and edgy. "We were better off without you."
"Oh, come on, don't be like that, Lizzy," Alex grinned a wicked grin. He knew Lisander hated that nickname. "I was busy. I was doing very important business. Big business."
"Business?" Princess Victoria laughed loudly. She wiped some apple juice foam from her lips. "What kind of business? Were you trying to pick up barmaids again? Or did you get lost on the straight road?"
Alex leaned back in his chair. He put his hands behind his head. He looked at all of them with a smug look.
'He he he. If they only knew. If they only knew what I just did. I just set a trap for a married woman. I am a genius.'
"No, Princess. Better than that," Alex said smoothly. "I was doing something very important. And let's just say... I planted a seed. A seed that is going to grow into a beautiful, beautiful flower for me to pluck."
The timid elf healer, whose name was Elara, looked at him with big, confused eyes. She tilted her head.
"A... a flower? You went gardening, Alex?" she asked softly. Her voice was like a tiny bell.
Alex looked at her and felt a surge of lust. She was so innocent. It was almost painful.
"Something like that, Elara. Something exactly like that," Alex said, licking his lips quickly. "Anyway, enough about me. Why was Juliana trying to kill our dear swordsman over here? What was the drama about?"
They chit chatted for a while...
Juliana suddenly extended her hand towards Lisander. She had a very smug look on her face. It was the face of a winner. Alex was totally confused. He was curious what the hell was happening now.
It was so weird. Just one minute ago they were fighting like cats and dogs, and now they were calmly doing something that looked like business? What was going on?
Lisander gnashed his teeth together hard. Grrr. He looked at Alex with pure hate in his eyes. He slowly pulled out a shiny gold coin from his pocket. He slammed the coin down onto her open palm.
"Yeah, bitch! I did say it! I told you so! I know this fool better than any of you guys!" Juliana cheered loudly.
Juliana grinned a wide grin and leaned back in her chair, flipping the coin with her thumb.
"Ah! What a waste," Lisander said with a sad shake of his head. "I was actually willing to throw a whole bundle of coins at you if he really retired... like, a huge stack of gold. But now? It comes to just one single gold coin."
Juliana froze. Her ears twitched when she heard the words "bundle of coins." Her eyes went wide. She suddenly looked at Alex with a scary expression.
"Retire!" she screamed.
"W-what?" Alex asked, leaning back. "What did you say?"
"You said it! You said you are going to retire! Why the fuck are you here then? Go home! Retire, you motherfucker!!"
She lunged across the table. She grabbed his collar with both hands and shook him violently back and forth. Shake! Shake!
'Ah, I see. It is about that...'
Alex realized what was happening inside his head. When Alex had spoken to Juliana earlier in the morning, he had told her that he wasn't coming back to the party.
She must have told the group about that news. And obviously, Lisander and Juliana must have placed a bet on whether he comes back or not. And it looks like Juliana won that specific bet because he came back.
But now? Now that Lisander offered her a giant stack of gold if he actually quit, this stupid greedy bitch was trying to force him to retire for real! She wanted the big money!
'Pff... what a stupid bitch. She is so greedy.'
Alex snickered loudly. He laughed right in her face. He grabbed her wrists and peeled her hands off his collar with a smooth motion. He fixed his shirt and looked at the group with a serious face.
"Are you crazy, woman? The only reason—the single and sole reason—I came back from my retirement was because of you! You begged me! You literally got down on your dirty knees in the middle of the crowded street and begged me not to retire!"
"What?! No way! That actually happened? She literally begged you?"
It was Lisander who shouted this. He was suddenly way more excited now. His eyes were wide open. He had momentarily and totally forgotten about his deep hate towards this stupid Alex. This was just too juicy to ignore! He leaned over the table, desperate for the gossip.
"Of course! Of course it happened! I swear on my life!" Alex shouted, standing up and acting it out. "You should have seen her, guys. It was pathetic. She was crying actual rivers of tears. There was green snot running down from her nose! It was disgusting!"
Both Elara and Victoria scowled at that part.
"She was clutching onto my pants like a baby monkey holding a tree! She was looking up at me and yelling, 'Please! Oh, Alex, I beg of you! You are the most handsomest man in our entire party! You are the best! And if I have to go on a dangerous quest without you, then it won't be worth it! I will die of sadness! Please, I beg of you, come back!'"
The whole table went silent for one second. Even Lloyd the nerd dropped his jaw.
"W-what?! I never said that!! That is a total lie!!"
Juliana screamed so loud her voice cracked. Her face turned completely red from embarrassment and rage.
"I NEVER SAID THAT! YOU LYING PIECE OF TRASH!"
She didn't just sit there. Oh no. She literally lunged across the wooden table like a wild tiger attacking its prey. She knocked over three empty cups and a bowl of peanuts. Crash! Clatter! She swung her fist right at Alex's smug face.
But Alex was ready. He leaned his head back smoothly, just like a master martial artist. Whoosh. Her fist missed his nose by one inch.
"Ha ha ha! Look at her! She is blushing!" Alex shouted, pointing a finger at her red face. "She is trying to kill me to hide her embarrassment! It is the classic reaction of a woman in love!"
"I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU!" Juliana shrieked. She tried to climb over the table, but Lloyd, the weak four-eyed mage, grabbed her waist desperately.
"Please, Juliana! Calm down! Everyone is watching us! My social anxiety can't handle this!"
Lloyd cried out, his glasses slipping down his sweaty nose. He was being dragged across the floor by her strength because he was so weak.
Lisander, leaned forward. He wasn't even trying to help. He was actually enjoying this show. A cruel smile played on his lips.
"So it is true," Lisander scoffed, looking at Juliana with disgust. "To think the fierce warrior Juliana would cry with snot running down her face for a man. Pathetic. Absolutely pathetic. I knew you had no dignity, but this? This is a new low."
"IT'S NOT TRUE! SHUT UP, LISANDER!" Juliana barked, flailing her arms.
"Oh my," Princess Victoria said softly. Her voice was like smooth silk. She didn't move an inch. She sat there with perfect posture, elegant and noble, holding her glass of apple-soda with her pinky finger raised high. She smiled a gentle, amused smile.
"Such passion. Such raw energy. It is quite entertaining to watch the commoners express their... intense feelings for each other. It is like a theater play, but dirtier."
She took a graceful sip of her drink. Sip.
"Is it really true?"
Elara whispered. She looked at Alex with big, innocent eyes. She blinked twice.
"Did she really have green snot? That is very unhygienic, Juliana. As a healer, I must advise you to blow your nose properly. Bacteria can spread through tears and mucous contact."
"SEE! Even the Elf believes me!" Alex laughed loudly, slamming his hand on the table. "Juliana, just admit it. You can't live without me. You are addicted to my handsome face!"
"ARGHHHH! LET ME GO, LLOYD! I WILL RIP HIS TONGUE OUT!"
In all of it, the only guy that wasn't able to express himself here was poor Lloyd himself.
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